What do you believe about love?
Post submissions here that match this topic thread in comments.
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What do you believe about love?
Post submissions here that match this topic thread in comments.
Theme by Anders Noren — Up ↑
June 29, 2024 at 9:46 pm
Aiden Pacheco
Love comes in all forms. It can be love for a sport, family member, or food. However love is chosen to be interpreted, there is no denying how strong of an emotion it is. A strong belief of mine comes in the form of self-love. I hold self-love to a higher standard than any other form of love because it is the strongest. How can anyone expect to receive love if they don’t give themselves love in the first place? From a personal standpoint, one of the biggest contributions a person can make when it comes to self-love is going to the gym. There are no downsides to physical activity. Being disciplined enough to push yourself through brutal workouts day after day shows that you truly care about yourself. One day in my sophomore year of high school a friend of mine brought me into the school weightroom. From that day on I was hooked. I began shifting my free time focus on the gym. It’s important to focus on the love nobody can see as well, such as your mind. Taking time to yourself is super important when it comes to keeping a healthy brain. Meditation, walks, and yoga are some practices I use to keep my mind in good shape as well as my body. When both physical and mental health are prioritized, there’s hardly anything a person can’t achieve. So, tell me, will you let yourself become the best you can be? After all, the only thing stopping you from becoming the best version of yourself is you.
July 2, 2024 at 2:52 am
I agree that self love is something that most people lack in today’s society, and more people need to learn to take care of themselves and love themselves. Good essay!
July 21, 2024 at 8:29 pm
For as long as I have known you Aiden, This definitely shows how you have changed as a person for the better. You undoubtedly seem more complete with your beliefs and opinions and as well as how you tackle obstacles in front of you. Proud of you man.
July 24, 2024 at 10:12 pm
That’s real because a lot of people nowadays let doubt stop them from achieving things in life. The best supporter you have will always be yourself, as long as you know that accomplishing the goals you set will be much easier!
July 30, 2024 at 1:38 am
I completely agree with you about the importance of self-love. Self-love forms the foundation for all other types of love and personal growth. Without a strong sense of self-respect and care, it’s challenging to embrace or give love to others fully. Also, the section where you mentioned that our commitment to physical fitness as a manifestation of self-love is inspiring. It’s remarkable how something as tangible as going to the gym can have such a profound impact on our overall well-being.
August 9, 2024 at 12:35 am
I agree with you about self-love. In order to love and be loved you need to know how to love yourself. Love is what makes someone feel good about themselves as well. Good explanation.
August 10, 2024 at 12:32 am
A’nayah S
What is love? Love is that person that accepts you for all your flaws, that doesn’t give up on you even when you need them the most, you can feel safe around them at any time, day and any place. Love is the way you feel when you look into their eyes and you know that everything is going to be ok. When you are laying next to them close you can feel them breathing in and out and somehow your breathing starts to match up with theirs. I’ve experienced this love, holding hands walking on the beach, late car rides, being silly together and having inside jokes nobody but you or your partner can understand. Love is also when you know that it is time to let go, you could love someone so much that you want to protect them as much as possible you need to let them go, knowing that you both know it’s for the best. But then sometimes it comes back, it comes back and it hits you stronger than ever before, you get more of a spark this time because although you already “know the person” this time around you really get to KNOW the person and that is when love becomes deeper. Although I am young and still experiencing life, I can be the one to say that I do know what love is. I feel what love is as well as seeing it with my own experiences and life. Love comes in all different ways, there are many types and ways you can describe love… What is love to you?
August 13, 2024 at 2:41 am
I honestly love this post so so much. As young as we are, we have all learned things about what love truly is. Thank you so much for showing your belief about love and how you think about it! 🙂
-Alannah Boucher
August 15, 2024 at 3:58 am
Denzel N
Something that made me wonder why the world is the way it is. Why can’t we as a collective species be kind for no apparent reason? Every day we go about our daily lives in different perspectives and as a kid I didn’t understand why we couldn’t just be kind to each other so that we all can be happy. Kindness is simple and has the power to make someone’s bad day turn into a great day just from a compliment or just something as simple as opening the door for someone. If we all made an extra conscious effort to not only be kind but not give hate and only constructive criticism we could advance as humans and it could then branch out. Kindness is important to me because as a kid I didn’t think kindness was that important. I thought why should I be kind when others are not kind to me made me question the act of kindness itself. But as I grew older and saw more of the world and its misfortunes and harsh conditions I gradually allowed myself to have a deeper understanding and sympathy for people who aren’t as fortunate as I am and from that day I tried in my everyday life to be as grateful and kind for everything around me. Not only was I more honest and intellectual about certain problems I was able to discover that I kindness not only can make me happy but others too. Just seeing people happy even something as little as a simple gesture can brighten a dark world so why not do it one day at a time. This makes me question how the world would be if kindness was absent and we were just mean and distrustful. How would we be if we could be just a little bit better toward each other? Would we be able to function as a society better and move towards a better and brighter future.
August 16, 2024 at 1:28 am
Brooke P
Love can be an interesting concept. The word itself is attached to so many different things. You can express it through words, or actions, or thoughtful gifts and even something as simple as attendance. I strongly agree with having a passion and having love for something that makes you unique. If you go into your best friend’s bedroom, it is littered with things they have expressed their love for. Something like a book on their bookcase or an app downloaded on their phone, to whether they have a basketball hoop hanging on their closet door and the color they had their walls painted. Passions are some of the things that separate you from me, the neighbor down the street from a kindergarten teacher. People’s love for their passions is what makes someone more than just a teacher, or a salesperson or a mere stranger. My belief is important to me because I like putting some of my love into things I am interested in, like art or music, in my case. I think everyone should have passions because they are proven to give further purpose, and it equips individuals with positive attitudes. Not only that, but it can bring folks together and give them more reasons to branch out and meet new people. Passions can also bring you closer to humans that you might not have considered reaching out to in the past, like a distant teacher or distracted friend. What are your passions?
September 3, 2024 at 12:27 pm
I love how you started to open your eyes to kindness growing up, that can be a very difficult thing. Great message! – Elaine S
August 25, 2024 at 3:08 pm
I truly admire this post because so many people overlook the love that this world contains until they form the most beautiful connection with someone.
-Jaeleigh B
August 26, 2024 at 6:03 pm
I like your perceptive about love and what you think it means to love. It makes people really question what truly is as whole and makes you try to think of love in different perspectives since love means something different for everyone. – Najah Burks
August 15, 2024 at 12:38 am
Bianca Louissaint
Self-love is the greatest love. Some may disagree but from my understanding self love is the biggest respect anybody could have for themselves. When you learn how to love yourself it teaches you to know your self-worth and how much people actually value you. Self-love is something I would say the majority of people struggle to do. I haven’t always been able to fully accept who I was, being a Haitian-American female in America isn’t as easy as it sounds. I grew up very differently than most people, moved from place to place, had to learn a brand new language. Growing up in a predominantly white area had its own challenges causing the toll of never understanding the true value of self-love.There’s always challenges in life that God places in front of you and it is your choice to either step up and deal with the problem in front of you or hide away. In the words of my mother “YOU are YOUR biggest enemy”, when I think about those words I see nothing but honesty you’re the only person stopping yourself from the growth that everybody seeks. So having a sense of self-love and respect is the greatest gift you can give to yourself. Knowing when it’s time to protect your peace is beautiful, allowing nobody to get in the way of making your mark on the world. Loving yourself means prioritizing your needs knowing when it’s time to set healthy boundaries for the sake of your own sanity.
August 26, 2024 at 6:11 pm
I love this idea. I have always been hard on myself, very unloving towards my own character. Everyone around me tried telling me to be more confident because there’s nothing wrong with me, but thats harder said than done. The way we perceive ourselves are very different from how others do. Everyone deserves to find self-love.
September 2, 2024 at 1:53 pm
Self love is so important others will try and put you down and others will try and lift you up. But most importantly you need to lift yourself up. self love is hard to do but when you are able to love yourself it feels amazing. No matter what know you’re someone who deserves love. I agree loving and respecting yourself is so important.
September 2, 2024 at 11:40 pm
This is VERY true. You should love yourself before you love others. We, as your mother said, can be our own greatest enemies — but if we allow ourselves, we can also be our own biggest supporters. It definitely is the greatest and most important kind of love.
August 16, 2024 at 2:24 am
I agree with all of this, and I think you worded everything really well. Self-love isn’t the easiest thing, I think that’s especially true for younger generations. I started going to the gym when I was coming out of a bad relationship. I started eating healthy, working out a bunch, and just trying to be there for myself. The thing that genuinely helped me was going to the gym, though. It didn’t matter if I was angry or sad, or even happy that day, I always left the gym feeling better than I did when I walked in. It’s been about two years since all that, and I still think the gym has played a big part in making me the person I am.
August 22, 2024 at 10:44 pm
I agree that self love is something that lacked in today’s society and that a lot of people let love stop them from achieving their goals. But once you find self love you’ll be able to do much better in life.
August 27, 2024 at 12:02 am
Self-love is so important. Many people give so much of themselves to others and end up getting hurt. It’s not healthy to provide so much love before you establish a foundation of love for yourself. Once you are comfortable with yourself love, then you can give more pure and stable love to others.
August 28, 2024 at 2:08 pm
I agree that love comes in all types of forms no matter what it is, self- love is a very important thing to have for yourself and to learn to have for yourself as well. Love this essay so much!!!
– Jackaline Fernandez
September 1, 2024 at 3:21 pm
I completely agree with this, it’s also so hard to notice when you’re miss treated by others when you don’t love yourself and see your worth. Self—love really does push you to be the best version of yourself. This essay was great!!
September 3, 2024 at 1:37 am
I totally agree with you! Self love is so important, and taking care of your wellbeing such as your mind and body makes a huge difference. I also find how going to the gym and staying active can help me feel more confident and in a positive mindset. It’s amazing how pushing yourself can change the way you think. The more we focus on ourselves to become the better version of us, the more unstoppable we can be.
September 3, 2024 at 2:01 pm
I really like this perspective of how love can be interpreted in so many different ways rather than believing love has to be this isolated definition that so many people try to force on each another. Reading about your dedication to yourself mentally and physically is also refreshing and inspiring considering how many people tend to focus on others instead of their own self love especially during high school.
September 3, 2024 at 7:58 pm
I absolutely agree, self love is so forgotten about or wrongly preached in today’s society. I just don’t believe someone can love someone else before loving themselves without creating toxicity in their relationship!
September 3, 2024 at 8:54 pm
Dominic G.
Self love is something is often not realized as a critical point in one’s one mental and emotional health. I also liked how you questioned the audience and its shown me that you are not afraid to show your true self.
September 4, 2024 at 2:40 am
Self-love is essential, in any sense of the matter learning to love yourself is a top priority and should be taken very seriously!
September 4, 2024 at 2:42 am
I completely agree with you. Self-love should be the number one priority. Great essay.
July 1, 2024 at 4:44 pm
For lack of a better category that I could understand, my submission to the “Love” section will discuss friendship, not traditional love. I tend to stay very close to my friends, not branching out very often, and I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with that. One of my oldest and closest friends was a very jokey, very goofy but still very competent being. He was a joy to be around, always the life of the party, until senior year of high school. All of a sudden he was distancing himself from all our friends, expressing practically every negative emotion you can think of, he turned into kind of a jerk. All of our friends had every right to start ditching him, he became insufferable, arrogant, starting new dramas with everyone that turned into grudges that seemed to never go away. Except for me, I never did anything to him, and the most he did to me was make conversations a bit rocky. After the music department’s trip, where I had to sit next to him, and he was beyond upset the whole time because he had to be around “all these people that he doesn’t like.” I had to ask afterwards, is there something going on? And he said yes, absolutely, he gave me everything, excuses, good and bad, but he kept one thing straight. He was sad that his distancing meant the separation of us two, and that I’ve never done him wrong. So I’ve had to sit with this dilemma. Do I still consider him a close friend because he still considers me his friend? Or do I properly leave him be as the rest of my friends rightfully did? I sincerely hope I don’t come across a problem like this in my time at college, but given its nature, that’s going to be pretty hard.
July 8, 2024 at 10:56 pm
I understand this well. A friend of mine did this with me as senior year came to a close but rather than acting upset all the time he just started distancing and not talking to me at all. We weren’t as close as you and your friend were but I still still considered him a friend I just don’t think he thought the same. Great essay though, it was a good read!
August 15, 2024 at 2:47 am
While losing friends sucks, I think at a certain point you have to remember that nobody is more important than yourself. I think communication is a really important thing that most people just don’t know how to do, but it seems like you did. As long as it doesn’t cause you any issues, I don’t see why you couldn’t still be friends with him.
August 15, 2024 at 5:02 pm
I can completely relate to your dilemma, I went through the same thing with my best friend. Although you want to stand by them because they aren’t ‘technically’ hurting you, you also need to acknowledge your own happiness and whether the friendship is hurting you. You can tell them that you are there for them to reach out should they need you without having to remain friends/hanging out consisitantly etc.
July 1, 2024 at 8:15 pm
Love comes in several ways and everyone needs to feel loved in the world. Following my graduation from high school, I joined a non-governmental organization called Open Dreams. As an active member of this organization, I gained several experiences. The most significant and impactful experience I had was during the Aviva’s Day organized by Open Dreams. AVIVA DAY is a day set aside by the Open Dreams Foundation to encourage and support children suffering from neonatal abnormalities. On this special day we visit hospitals to share gifts and words of encouragement to these families since most of these babies are in critical states. This day is special to me because it was the first experience I had since I joined the organization and it has always been a tradition to assist these babies. Being part of it made me feel like I am contributing to the social growth of my community. To support the family of these babies we bought; packs of water, Diapers, and other baby accessories.
During our visit to the neonatal unit in the hospital we were welcomed by the nurses and families of these babies. I gave a speech on the purpose of our visit and a word of encouragement to the parents of these babies. These parents were grateful as the joy on their faces had not been hidden but expressed. We gave them words of encouragement as the atmosphere was filled with love and joy.
Personally I believe this action is significant to society as it gives hope to various parents and makes them know that there is love in the world. This is very important to the community as it encourages the spirit of togetherness(Ubuntu spirit) which is a key factor for community growth and development. While at UMASS Dartmouth I would like to share my experiences with my classmates and peers. Equally, I will contribute to the various community engagement organizations on campus so that I will continue spreading love around me. This is because love is the force which makes us human.
July 9, 2024 at 7:25 pm
This is very admirable that you’re part of such an amazing organization and I agree that love is the force which makes us human.
July 8, 2024 at 10:49 pm
Trenton F
As my time at high school came to an end I came to the realization some people aren’t permanent and in most cases those people aren’t right for you rather this be in friendships or relationships. I believe that friends and partners should be chosen very carefully to be and stay in your life.
I experienced this with a friend of mine who would always talk to me at the beginning of senior year but as the end of the year came closer and closer he talked to me less and less until he eventually just stopped and acted like he didn’t know who I was.
I also was the cause of an experience like this to a friend of mine once. We’re still friends but I’m surprised they still wanted to be friends after I had completely broken their trust. They shared a secret of theirs with me and I thought I could fix their problem and tried doing so without giving a care for what they thought upon the matter but it only ended up with them being mad at me so now I’ve sworn to never do anything of that matter again. Overall this completely ruined our friendship, although we still consider each other friends we only talk once a day.
Another example of choosing bad friends is that my sister wanted to be popular in high school only for some of her closest friends she made to turn on her and make fun of her some even started to bully her but as soon as they started acting nice again she just let them right back into her life like none of that had happened.
In conclusion I feel like everyone should choose their friends and partners carefully. Choose someone who will be with you through thick and thin, someone who will stand up for you when others don’t, someone who you know you can trust with absolute certainty, and lastly choose people who can help you later on in life rather that be in relationships, friendships, or careers. Anyone could be a potential someone to you, you just got to know where to look and fine people that you’ll get along with but make sure they aren’t a bad fit for you.
July 11, 2024 at 3:54 pm
I agree with you on picking the people you want the closest to you carefully! People will use you, pick on you, look for popularity and many other things but what I have learnt in my mistakes of picking people to be in my circle is that it is way better to have four quarters than one hundred pennies.
July 22, 2024 at 3:12 am
I couldn’t agree more! I had a best friend for the first three years of high school, but by the end of senior year, we just kept getting into fights and making each other angry. We had changed so much throughout high school, that by the end of it, our friendship had nothing left to go on. Life is full of changes, and people change too. Sometimes it’s for the better, but sometimes it’s not. Relationships in life come and go, it’s just natural.
August 5, 2024 at 12:29 am
This is a fantastic way to put it. The good thing about friendships is that as time goes on, your circle tends to get smaller, which causes the bond to be more meaningful.
August 10, 2024 at 3:36 am
I agree with you about choosing the people you want around you carefully. There are lots of people out there who will mistreat you and distance themselves or leave without saying anything. Sometimes people grow apart but I always say everything happens for a reason, no matter what it is.
August 19, 2024 at 6:38 pm
I agree, I had a friend that I’ve known since kindergarten and we all got along really well until about 11th grade. He would ask for a rides and hangout but he never payed anyone back for gas, food etc. So we slowly started to not talk to him and we eventually we weren’t friends anymore.
September 3, 2024 at 8:03 pm
This is a great view! I believe that people rarely make friends for the right reasons. That’s including myself I often make friends because I want lots of friends cause I think it makes my life look better, in turn I end up having bad relationships with these people and get hurt.
September 3, 2024 at 8:32 pm
I love this idea. I have always valued the people closest to me and having a strong friendship with them instead of trying to be friendly with as many people as possible. I have known so many people who have all of these friends but are ultimately not included in much, and they aren’t valued by their friends as much as they value them. I have always enjoyed keeping my circle of close friends small and creating life-long connections with them.
July 11, 2024 at 4:03 pm
Aliyah Tetreault
Growing up, taught me a lot about love. Yes, I love my family but I am talking about that one person that lights up the room when they walk in. My parents never made it in their relationship due to a lack of communication and focus. So, my mom has been in search since their relationship ended. What people do not usually understand is, loving someone means knowing them fully. You may learn new things about them over time, but knowing what they like to do, their hobbies, goals in life and so much more will pay off in the end. Watching my mom constantly unhappy hurt me growing up due to feeling like there was no room for me. Spring of 22’ I had met the person that I believed I loved. We got to know one another and found out what we had in common. Everyday was an adventure or story to tell. I never thought there would be an ending between him and I, no matter how much I tried to talk it through and beg him to stay. All I was left with was a broken heart and photos of our time together. The love I had for him consumed me, causing me to lose sight of my reality. After a year I began to finally learn how to love myself and realize how important that is. One of the biggest lessons I have learned is that self love is key. If you do not love yourself you cannot fully love anyone else. Never lose sight of yourself but never forget that there is a person for you, you just have to be patient.
July 29, 2024 at 8:31 pm
Love can be so insanely complicated. Nobody knows how to do it perfectly. It’s something you learn from time and experiences. Even if one relationship doesn’t work out, it allows you to learn and grow for your next. Everyone deserves love, like you said, and self-love is absolutely essential, and it can be so difficult to find. I’m so happy you decided to share this experience, because so many people need to hear it.
August 2, 2024 at 5:42 pm
I agree with what you said about having to love yourself before loving anyone else because then you could end up depending so much on that person so much. That could put a lot of weight of the both of you which is so unhealthy. Good Essay!
August 14, 2024 at 7:01 pm
I think that this is a beautiful way to put it. Love comes in all different forms and the most important form is self-love! I had to learn this over time as well, and although it was difficult to accept, it took me far to know about myself
July 11, 2024 at 9:49 pm
Love Conquers All Things
I believe that love has the overwhelming power to conquer anything and everything. Love is the reason why the world and humanity exist today.
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
[John 3:16]
As a young girl I always questioned how an emotion -Love – had the ability to influence people’s actions. I sometimes found myself asking, “what is love?” I wondered can I see love? I always believed that anything that had the ability to change emotions and stir the decisions of great men had to be tangible or else did not exist truly. The older I became I heard my parents use the phrase “I love you”. I knew my parents were happy to have me and this same phrase was said to me more times than I could count. Still, I wondered, what truly is love? What does it mean to love someone so much and what is one willing and able to do when led by love? The older I became, I realized that there were other emotions which people confused for love, infatuation, lust, even empathy.
I did not fully understand what true love felt like until I turned seventeen and I met him. He makes me feel like no one has or ever will. His constant love, tenderness and patience leaves me breathless. When will I ever be able to see him again?
August 27, 2024 at 6:32 am
I liked that you quoted the bible
August 28, 2024 at 3:43 pm
I completely agree, love has such a strong power to overcome any hardship in life. Love for many comes in different forms whether it be faith to finding comfort in someone close. I feel like it takes a lifetime to understand love, and even then do we truly comprehend it? Awesome response, I really enjoyed reading it!
September 1, 2024 at 3:26 pm
I agree, love is so strong and can be so confusing to feel for someone. It is so strong that sometimes it feels overwhelming. Great essay!!
July 14, 2024 at 10:10 pm
Rebecca G.
When I think about what love is, and I mean really think about it, I think about what it means. There are many, many ways love can be explained. Love could be a maternal figure, loving her child, or a platonic affection towards a friend. It could be a physical love between partners. It could even just be something you say, for example when you say you love something, like a material thing. There are even Biblical explanations of what love is, such as:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” [1 Corinthians 13:4-7]
In short, love is many things, can be described in many ways, and has extremely different meanings depending upon contextual description.
As much as we may try, love may not always be reciprocated. There was once when I was young, that I had a pair of friends, whom I platonically loved. One of them was quite rude and often talked about me behind my back. When she was with me and the other person, though, it was like she was a wholly different person. This really affected my perception of people for quite a long time, and I wasn’t as open with people much. Since then, I have learned the true meaning of love and have learned to accept and see people in a different way.
I believe that love is very, very important. It is, for lack of better words, what makes the world go round. If we had more love in the world, I believe that we would have a much more loving and accepting community.
August 2, 2024 at 7:24 pm
I absolutely love that verse from the Bible. Love is probably one of my favorite fruits of the Spirit. It’s important to go about life full of love. Love comes with many different attributes that form what the meaning of love really is. I truly agree with you that love is so important nowadays in order to make our world a much better place!
August 15, 2024 at 3:07 am
Corinthians 13 is honestly one of my favorite verse, and really affects the way I view love. I agree with what you’re saying. Love is complex and is a huge part of what makes life meaningful.
July 16, 2024 at 7:06 pm
Karilene P.
Love has so many meanings. It’s a bond that involves others’core values, beliefs, and life goals. Love can also refer to a strong like for something, like a sport.
It is a feeling that can be difficult to define, yet its impact is powerful. One of the most important aspects of love is its ability to bring out the best in people. Love encourages us to put others needs before our own, creating effects of goodwill and positivity. When we love someone, we strive to understand their perspective and experiences.
We are in a world that is often divided by differences, which love serves as a force that promotes harmony. It’s through love that we find the motivation to pursue our dreams.
I believe that love is very confusing.
August 9, 2024 at 6:24 pm
Emily G.
I love this! Using the word ‘love’ can be so different throughout society, yet it is one of the many Important words we use to come together as one big community!
July 16, 2024 at 10:34 pm
What I believe love is. Love is a lot of things and many emotions, love can be parents, pets, or yourself but when it comes to emotions about love it could be fear, stress, hate, anger, pain, and a lot more.
Growing up, I realized that love isn’t for everyone, and everyone has different opinions based on experiences, but I know that one type of love is strongest: self-love. Self-love doesn’t come from someone loving you it comes from yourself and to love yourself you need to have a powerful mindset and believe that you’re important to others no matter what.
The reason I brought up self-love is that not everyone can wake up in the morning and tell themselves how pretty or handsome they look; this is because they don’t see themselves as others see them. Love can also be beautiful, being in love with someone how much joy that could bring to a person.
Love is different and sometimes complicated, enclosed human emotions such as depression and cheerful feelings. Love is also the way we see each other everyone has different tastes in things music, reading, technology, and more we can’t expect everything to go easy it has to get out of hand sometimes for us to see the world.
How would you define love in your way?
July 28, 2024 at 2:07 pm
I agree love is something we as people view differently but learning to love ourselves and the things we do is a good way to grow and see the world. Nice job!
July 24, 2024 at 4:52 pm
Madison L.
In my opinion, love has always been the key to everything in life. Having love for yourself was the beginning of it all. As you grow older, you become more aware of others and more aware of yourself. At around 13 years old, I began to notice how different I was from my classmates and peers. My body type, my hair, the way I talked, and ultimately the way I carried myself. Being different and aware of being different led me to feel very insecure and unsure of myself. Untreated insecurity within led to self-hatred. The following years there was a shift in my personality. I thought very negatively about myself and others. I was full of hate. Because of this, maintaining relationships and friendships was difficult. Over time, I came across some really wise people. They had this radiant energy about them that they were able to shift towards others. Their kindness and love filled every room they walked into. Happy with all things. I always wondered what was the key or secret to living that type of life. It’s all love. So I learned to love myself flaws and all. Accept and embrace the things I can’t change and work on the things I can if it will make me happier. I became less hateful and more kind. I saw the world in a different perspective and became less judgmental. When I was able to love myself It became much easier to love others. It makes you wonder about all the horrible things people do to each other in this lifetime. If these individuals discovered love, self love, would they still have hate in the heart? Would they still take that hate out on others? Is self love key to it all?
July 29, 2024 at 9:18 pm
I think that your self-love discovery is absolutely incredibly beautiful, and I wish more people in the world were able to experience it. I do think that if people looked inwards and began loving themselves, they’d begin to love others as well. I think that’s an absolute show of maturity and one of the purest forms of love.
August 10, 2024 at 6:44 pm
Loving yourself is always important when it comes to relationships. Some relationships are hard to control or maintain once your older due to your own personal beliefs and changes. I understand and empathize with you when it comes to self-hate. I haven’t been proud of my abilities and that’s okay, as long as you promise yourself it’s okay to be you. Loving yourself can be extremely hard but, if you understand yourself and continue to look inwards I believe that love will follow. Whether that be, friendships or future romantic relationships.
August 13, 2024 at 12:30 pm
I relate a lot to the struggle of feeling disconnected from your peers! I agree completely, it’s important to cultivate love for yourself, and doing so will allow the right people to enter your life. It’s amazing how the people you’ve met have helped you to hold more love for yourself and others!
August 15, 2024 at 5:36 pm
Your personal story of isolating yourself from others until you learned to love yourself is very beautiful. I still find myself weighed down by self hatred and so hearing your story was quite inspiring. You paint self love as a journey, as a mental skill you had to practice in order to gain. I find that relatable, and I hope to gain the level of self love you have in the future. Nice essay.
September 2, 2024 at 6:11 am
I completely agree with this. I’m my opinion you need to be able to love yourself before you can love others. I do agree that if people loved themselves more, it would be easier for them to love others.
July 24, 2024 at 10:09 pm
Love has been a powerful force in this world for generations before us and it will continue to be for many generations ahead. Love affects people due to how they choose to define the word. My definition of love is when you have somebody that you would go to the moon and back for. Somebody who no matter what they do to you, you’ll always be their shoulder to cry on. Somebody who you’ll always forgive. Somebody who both your heart and mind aches for. Somebody who you would do everything in your power to protect and nurture. Love isn’t something you lose over time. If you really love someone you’ll always love them. You will always care about them, for them and about how or what they’re doing. It may not be as strong as it once was but it’s still there. But if it isn’t you never loved them in the first place. “I love this…” or “I love that…” are materialistic fascinations, pleasures and or desires. You can love an object but it won’t and can’t love you back. It’s almost like the love most people have for money. Money doesn’t cause love, it’s what you can do with it. The chemical in the brain that induces love, dopamine can be overwhelming. You can love so much that you can’t eat or sleep. An intense love that can make or break a person. A love that almost everyone hopes to have and share with someone one day. My definition of love isn’t something you feel for someone and then it’s gone, it’s an ever growing feeling of affection that can’t be forced upon another. Meaning that no matter how much you love someone nobody can make them love you back but themselves. Older people are always telling the youth “Oh what do you know about love? You’re too young”. If that is true how do they love you, the parents? How do they love you, the grandparents? How do they love their siblings and or pets. How do they love themselves if you claim that they do not know what “love”? It is true that not everyone has ever thought about what they consider love to be, but unless you give them the chance you can’t tell anyone they do not know what love is because love and being able to show love is taught. Deciding whether to show it or not is a choice.There is no one correct definition of love, just like fingerprints the definition varies amongst each individual and no two are the same. Love and the feeling of love is almost impossible to share with others. It is almost impossible to exactly explain the type of love you feel for another person. Those butterflies or the warm feeling you get when you think of that person; the loss of words when you’re in their presence; the inability to think straight when you’re talking to them. Everybody’s feelings are and are expressed differently.
August 3, 2024 at 10:53 pm
Ydais M.
I completely agree that love cannot be explained in a simple way. The feeling of love and idea of love itself can come in so many different ways. Not one person can understand someone else’s feelings of love. When you mentioned older generations questioning what we would know about love. I related to that so much.
July 26, 2024 at 2:50 pm
Brett F
No good deed goes unpunished, a phrase I stood by until this past month. Ever since I was a little kid, all I wanted was to be a good person. In my eyes, to be a good person means living a meaningful life. I never realized how much work it truly was, constantly putting others before yourself as well as often making sacrifices. I was told by others there was no point in being a good person as no one cared: I slowly started to believe them. By this point, I was burnt out on being selfless, but whatever powers may have granted me a sign to not give up. A player on my team reached out to me for advice. He chose to speak to me because “I have a good heart.” This text changed everything for me, as it showed that there are in fact people who noticed what you do for others and even felt so confident in my good hearted nature that they might ask me how they would know they are a good person. This experience increased my resolve and has made me as committed as ever to supporting those around me through kindness and selfless acts as it changed my mind on the fact that there is some worth to being a good person.
July 27, 2024 at 4:45 pm
Olivia M
Loving someone is a very profound thing. For some, to love someone takes a week or a couple of days, for others it takes months or even years. For me, it took 5 months and will carry on endlessly because I thought the person I spent two years loving was the person I was meant to love forever.
I recently realized that although I loved them with everything I was capable of, I lost sight of myself and who I was because of how much I wanted to keep them happy. I did not realize how important self-love was and how much I needed it, and it took me up to the point of our beautiful relationship ending for me to realize I had no idea how to be alone.
I learned day by day and piece by piece who I was and that although it hurt, I was safe by myself, and I did not need them to be there to know who I was as a person. I was supported by friends and family who held my hand step by step along the way and helped me see that I was my own person, and I could do things on my own.
As much as the breakup hurt and knocked me down for a little while, I do genuinely believe it was for the better for us as individuals. I love hard and I am prone to getting hurt because of that, but I will not let that stop me from loving myself just as hard as I love others because I do deserve to be loved in a way that makes me feel good.
Without the ending of our relationship, I would not know how much I can love myself. Being able to love someone so deeply is an amazing thing, but being able to love yourself and be happy by yourself is immensely better. It took me 5 months to learn how to love myself and that love will carry on endlessly.
August 9, 2024 at 2:56 am
I 100% agree with your words. I liked how you included that you wouldn’t have been able to know how much you love yourself without ending it. Everyone does fall in love at different times and also what they think is love might not be.
July 28, 2024 at 2:37 pm
Tatyana D.
There are many different versions of love and people have love for many different things like family, music, sports, and even food. Love can be perceived in many different ways, it will always be one of the biggest emotions out there in the world. One of my strongest beliefs about love is self-love. I think that it is one of the most helpful, and important forms of love. Without self-love, I believe that there is no other way to show love for anything else that you’re passionate about. My point of view of self-love is to show love to yourself and believe in yourself no matter what. Something that made me change my view on self-love was I noticed during my freshman year in high school that when I started to believe in myself even when nobody else really did I was able to work harder, and push myself to do better in school and just in life in general. Ever since I started to love myself and started to believe in myself, I have started to improve in almost everything I’m trying to do in my life. I believe that everyone in the world needs to start with self-love before trying to show a lot of love and passion in other things they want to do in their lifetime. Take time to speak words of affirmation to yourself, take time to prioritize yourself over other things that may possibly drain your energy, and celebrate accomplishments you make in your life no matter how big or small it is. Self-love will be very helpful and very important during your college journey to do what you need to accomplish during your years there. So, during your college journey just continue to be yourself and love yourself so you’re able to accomplish all that you want to and hopefully even more.
August 13, 2024 at 3:31 pm
ZairahS
I really love your essay and also feel like it resonates with me a little. I definitely agree with you on self-love being the first love you need and how you start seeing changes in your life once you start because that’s what happened to me throughout high school, I stopped doubting myself as much and started doing so much better in everything.
July 28, 2024 at 6:48 pm
Makenna C.
There is a quote that I hold fairly close to my heart, and that I often find myself reciting to myself which goes, “No matter how much or how often people hurt each other, loving someone is never a waste.” I think that it’s mainly the last part of the quote that really holds the majority of the impact on me, the phrase “loving someone is never a waste”.
Now, to fully understand this quote in the deepest depths that your brain will allow, I will do my best to break it down for you in the way that I myself see it. The way that I have interpreted this quote is that even if a relationship ends poorly; whether that be romantic, platonic, or anything in between, the love that you have given to that person was not wasted simply because you are no longer in that relationship, because everyone deserves to feel loved by someone. No matter how badly that person may have wronged you, there is still a part of them that not only longs for love, but also needs it. Because, in the majority of situations, people will hurt others if they themselves are hurting. Which by no means gives them the right to hurt others at all, but it does however give you an opportunity to still choose to love this person, even if it’s just a little bit, because a little bit of love can go a long way in someone’s day. Because after all, hurt people, hurt people, but love can heal all.
July 28, 2024 at 10:27 pm
Learning about the concept of amatonormativity forced me to question a deeply-entrenched belief. Previously, I had assumed that others were strange for placing such an importance on romance and love; of course, I love my friends and family, sure, but I could never understand how obsessed they were with love stories and arbitrarily pairing off people who didn’t have to be together. I maybe had the vague thought that something might be wrong with me, but thankfully, I never dwelled on it long enough to leave lasting trauma. Crushes in grade school were platonic at best, trying to fit in because sure, that’s what those are, right? Am I doing it right yet? It was mostly a problem in the way that I felt alienated from those around me. Books, movies, music; everything centered around romance. Anywhere you look, anywhere you go, romance follows because it’s Finding out about asexuality, and by extension, aromanticism, helped me come to the realization that I was not alone in my experiences. It has, since, allowed me to find my own community and allowed me to enhance my relationships. It’s not that I don’t love, or I don’t love enough, but instead that I love differently than most people around me. And you know what? I’m OK with that.
July 29, 2024 at 9:36 pm
Asexuality and aromanticism was something I struggled so long to understand as a alloromantic. My best friend is on the ace spectrum and I am so grateful I got to learn so much from their experiences, and yours. Loving yourself for you, and knowing that you just love differently is incredible, and I hope everyone can recognize that.
August 14, 2024 at 11:03 pm
Arrow W.
I believe that love is complicated. Love isn’t simple, and if anything love is this giant ball of fire that explodes before it fizzles and eventually calms.
Love has always been something I couldn’t fully understand, and something I never fully accepted. I knew that I loved my friends, and I knew that I loved my family. But romantic love? Romantic love taught me that love isn’t straightforward.
When I was in middle school, I was very adamant that I would never date anyone, never get married, and never have kids. I was so certain that my feelings of this would never change, and because I constantly had people and family telling me that I would change, I became stubborn. There became a point where I denied myself reality because I didn’t want to prove them right.
Throughout 8th grade, I discovered a lot of different things about love, and the different types of relationships. I also learned about asexuality. Asexuality, in simple terms, is lacking or having no sexual attraction towards other people. This was the year that I learned that there was a term for how I was, and that I was asexual. This is still the truth now. However, it was my asexuality that made me think I never wanted to ever date someone ever because simply enough I couldn’t even get attracted to other people.
Then I got my first big crush.
I had had smaller crushes before this moment, but this was an Earth shattering realization for me at the time, and I outright refused to believe that it had happened. It wasn’t possible, and it was one of my best friends, surely this isn’t anything. This is where I learned that romantic attraction is quite a bit different, and a separate thing, to sexual attraction, and that I still had that attraction towards other people, and it took me quite a while for me to accept that these feelings existed and to embrace who I was.
Once I had accepted myself, because I had denied it for so long and was new to such feelings of love, how I reacted to love was a lot like how I explained it earlier; a ball of fire. While I never admitted it to this friend, I look back and realize how oddly I had been acting, and wish that I could shake some sense into myself to stop myself from being that embarrassing. But that’s how love is, it takes shape in different forms and does odd things to you. For me, love in all its forms takes the shape of a flaming ball that suddenly awakens and blows up, before eventually fizzling and flickering, but never truly snuffed out.
This is an example of an experience of mine that led me to the belief that love was complicated. Not necessarily in a positive and or negative way, but that in its entirety it’s complicated and based on every person’s individual feelings and experiences, and we can’t prescribe to someone else how those emotions may or may not form or exist or change. This is something I believe is important for everyone to understand, and to accept, as it is through this acceptance, we can truly thrive as individuals, and as a community.
August 14, 2024 at 11:18 pm
As a fellow asexual, I totally relate to this. That feeling of isolation from one’s peers simply because in different media and mediums love was always expressed through cishet narratives, and through that lens there’s really no way to explore differences in love. And I really like how you phrased “Its not that I don’t love, or I don’t love enough” because that’s truly it, and I’ve never really thought to describe it like that before but it’s a really beautiful way to put it.
July 29, 2024 at 1:47 pm
Chengyu Yang
I am a Chinese girl, in my opinion, Chinese don’t usually express our love to the people who we love, but we usually express our love by some obscure or even some “inappropriate” ways. I think it must because of our shyness or the culture we have always had. We don’t often say “I love you” to someone directly but we usually do some things that can show our love. Such as a big and silent hug after quarreling and a bottle of warm milk after silent treatment. We always get hot and cold in the topic of love.
But we can’t say that Chinese people don’t know what is love. From the love of parents, in Chinese old saying : Father’s love is like a mountain and Mother’s love is like water; The mountain is big but silence and the water is soft and delicate but also without a sound. So I think we have our own way to show love, maybe they are embarrassed or improper.
These days, more and more young men in China try to show their love by a new way or learn to show our love like the people of western culture. We are trying to say “I love you” loudly and directly, showing our love in front of people because we see that if we do that, people we love can feel our love more , people around us will also cheering for us.
I wish I can try to show love more frank and honest but not coy and shy!!
August 6, 2024 at 6:20 pm
I think the concept of showing love in other ways is beautiful. Sometimes saying the words “I love you” can be out of habit and not mean what it should. By doing gestures that show love is prevalent, to me means more than just saying the words. You can always say the words “I love you”, but providing actions that coincide with the concept shows true love and appreciation for the person. I think that the mountain and water metaphor is a beautiful way of putting it. Because I think that in American culture, the words “I love you” are so overused. We say it about everything which kind of diminishes the meaning of the words. Gestures of love are not repetitive in the sense that you don’t go out of your way to do things for the things you do not have love for. What I am trying to say is that I think the gestures are a beautiful way of showing that you actually love someone because saying it could be out of habit or because it is so overused in the modern day.
August 9, 2024 at 12:47 am
I agree. Sometimes “I love you” can be abused. At the end of the day, the actions are the only things that truly matter. For example, my father whenever he knew I liked anything such as a muffin, he’d make sure to wake up early and go buy it for me so I could eat breakfast. Sometimes the little things matter other than saying the words “I love you.”
August 9, 2024 at 12:40 pm
This is so true for me. My grandmother can’t even say “I love you” to her great-grandchild, but she expresses her love through actions and care. I guess we never learned how to talk softly because our parents were also not treated with soft words like “I love you” from their parents. However, I personally think the “inappropriate ways” of showing love are messed up, even if it is doubtlessly effective. We can’t change the custom, but we can change the next generation by giving some honest words and actions of love to them.
July 29, 2024 at 8:03 pm
Drexel P. This response will also have to do with gender ideology as well as love. When I was in late elementary school, early middle school, I was absolutely, adamantly anti-LGBTQ. I didn’t understand it, and from things I had heard around me, it seemed like the norm. This was ironic, considering one of the first crushes I had ever had was on someone of the same sex. My best friend enjoyed videos made by a married non-binary couple, and would often show me these videos. It was up until this point that I had been very quiet about my “beliefs”. When I voiced them to my best friend, they corrected me, sat me down, and educated me. At first I thought it was absurd. But they didn’t let up until I began to understand. Over time, I began looking into the LGBTQ definitions, into people’s stories that were just like mine. I came to find out what I was dealing with was called “internalized homophobia”. It was hard to process and work through, but I was lucky enough to have an open-minded, incredible best friend who loved me for me. I came to accept that I identified with the label of Pansexual (gender-blind love). Later in middle school, I also became comfortable with the fact that I am transgender as well. I identified with the Genderfluid label, and had become so comfortable with it, I told my other friends as well. They were not as receptive to it as my best friend. I was told that it was stupid, that it didn’t exist, that I would not be taken seriously using a word like that. Even when I told my own mother, she laughed in my face, and walked away. Immediately I attempted to hyper feminize myself. Tried to make myself comfortable with being a woman, dressing femininely, being what everyone saw me as. I was miserable. It took me until sophomore year in high school to be happy with myself as I am again. I changed my name, and came out to my closest friends. Eventually, I was comfortable enough in myself that the whole school knew I was trans. It was scary, and young me would not be proud of who I am today. But I’ve grown enough to be proud for her. Not everyone in the world will love me, or like me, or tolerate me. But that’s okay, because I’m happy with who I am, and that is the richest form of happiness I could have ever asked for.
July 31, 2024 at 2:30 am
Hearing your story and being able to share that shows how strong you are! It was great that you had the person able to educate you on the topic of the LGBTQ community. It just shows that with being open minded how your views can change when you listen!
July 31, 2024 at 4:08 pm
As another member of the LGBTQ+ community, I completely understand where you’re coming from. I have also dealt with similar feelings and faced similar challenges. I think the funny thing about love though, is that we’re all in this together. That’s the reason they call it a community.
August 12, 2024 at 10:28 pm
It is so enlightening and empowering to see your story laid out as an LGBTQ+ person and seeing how it took loving yourself to get to where you are today. Including the moments where you may have put that part of yourself away and tried to change, even if it made you miserable. I find that I relate to certain aspects of your story and find an odd sense of relief in seeing another member of the community having gone through similar things. Thank you for your vulnerability and being willing to show that things like this are never constantly happy and sweet, but that downs and relapses do exist.
August 14, 2024 at 11:32 pm
Just seeing other people in the same community as me on this blog expressing similar experiences of loving oneself and or others is a really nice reminder that I’m not alone and that there are others like me. I also relate a lot to your experience of being trans, as a trans guy myself. My scenario was a bit different, and instead of dressing hyper-feminine, I tried to be really masculine (before I even knew I was trans) and hated anything deemed feminine because I hated anything that was seen as something worn or something done by specifically girls, and for me it wasn’t until high school either (sophomore year as well ironically enough) that I realized who I was and accepted that I didn’t have to express myself a certain way to be myself! I’m glad you were also able to discover who you were and embrace that, and it truly is one of the richest forms of happiness.
September 1, 2024 at 1:06 pm
As someone who is a part of the LGBTQ+ community, your post made me feel less alone. I’m glad that there are going to be people at Umass Dartmouth that I can relate to, and although I have friends and family that love and support me, its nice that there will be people here that accept me for who I am
July 30, 2024 at 8:05 pm
Mohamed Ahmed,
Love is something that is different and unique to every person depending on who they are how they were raised and who they used the word with. The truth is anyone can love and anything can be loved as long as it has the will for it. I believe love is something you should experience with someone you truly feel something for which you’ve never felt before. Something indescribable and something never been felt before. For when you reach this is when you find out that you love. Love isn’t described by a definition. It’s a unique link for each person to another. It’s easy to be deceived and believe you are loved when you are not. It is easy to do the same back and believe you love when you do not! The most important thing is how you manage your feelings and handle it after making such a discovery. With that, love is something everyone deserves to experience. And everyone deserves to have love in them. No matter where they get it from. Without love you won’t have peace in your life. Find someone for you and Leave the rest. I believe love is something missing from us. And we need more of it in the United States and every where around the world.
July 31, 2024 at 2:26 am
Anthony P
Love is a beautiful thing, and it can be characterized in many ways. It could mean family, friendship, or by chance a significant other. There is a bittersweet feeling of how these relations affect our life. However, it is particularly important to take a step back and consider the realization of how important it is to value these relationships. Having a support system for when problems arise and feel like you are drowning; although you are not alone. Every time I go through an obstacle in life, I know that I will have my people to lean on to help relieve the troubles. For people who feel as if they do not have their “people;” you will find them and you will know when you do. One of my core values is how life was meant for building bridges and finding those companions. This does not mean you cannot still have independence; you just need to have balance. These relationships may be hard but overall, it will all be worth it. Getting to experience life with others is just beautiful and that is what I believe was intended for everyone. Being able to share memories and have those imbedded into our hearts and souls. To love and cherish those moments of people who may not be a part of your story anymore. No matter where it takes you just know that it has shaped you who you are today. We learn from experiencing events around us to better understand love.
July 31, 2024 at 3:14 pm
Emmett S
My idea of love has to do with friendship rather than a romantic or familial love. Loving your family is important but I feel like the love for your friends is more pure or genuine. In many cases, including my own, my family loves me unconditionally but I imagine they would not love me if I was not their son, they wouldn’t even know who I am. That’s what separates the love of family to the love of friends for me because friends start off as strangers. My friends are some of the most important people to me because I love them for who they are and they love me for who I am. I think my friends are so important to me because it wasn’t until around my sophomore year of highschool that I felt like I had real friends. I don’t believe this is exactly true though. While I did feel like this I do not think it is because I did not have friends but rather because I was not confident in the friendships I had. I did not feel confident enough to call these people that I talk to everyday “friends”. This leads into possibly the most important form of love, self love. It took me a while to love myself. I would go as far to say I hated myself. I was pulled out of this sad illusion by my friends. I will always love my friends for being my friends and loving me.
August 5, 2024 at 8:11 pm
Emily M
I understand this passage deeply. I often think about the differences in love that both my friends and family have for me. Most mothers and fathers love their children because those are their sons and daughters, but my friends love me because of who I am and not my relation to them. I have cousins my same age, and I often think would they even speak to me if we weren’t related? I don’t think I’ll ever find out the answer to that question, but it’s one I often wonder. Your friends do meet you as total complete strangers, they know nothing about you and have no idea who you are, but they love and embrace you just because you’re you and to them that’s enough. But we also do the same for them. I love my friends dearly, and that is something I chose to do, not because of my relation to them, but because of the platonic love I have towards them. Friendship love is a different kind of love because it’s not love that is expected to be given due to genetic relation or living situations, it’s a type love someone chooses to give because they think your worthy of it. And that to me is one of the greatest unspoken compliments in life. Our friends are our friends because they want to be, not because it’s expected of them. Both side of a friendship start out by embracing a total stranger and then beginning to form a lifelong bond with them. The process of friendship is incredible to witness and it’s something that should be indefinitely cherished. Out of all the people in the world who my friends could’ve chosen to care for they chose me, and that’s something I have endless gratitude for.
July 31, 2024 at 4:05 pm
Anika H.
Love can be simple or love can be complex. As said by The Beatles though, “love is all you need.” There is a trend online right now that reflects on what a person thought love to be and where they actually found it. I like this trend because I think It’s important to reflect upon what a person values in their life. For me, I thought I would find love in forcing myself to be someone I was not. In actuality, love was acceptance from the people around me. Love was finally coming to terms with who I was, while still grieving what I wished I could be in the past. Love can be simply giving a tight hug after a long day, or love can be waking up next to someone who makes a cloudy day feel bright. Love can even be putting up a pride flag after thinking the feeling of acceptance would never come. Love varies for everyone and I think that’s part of the beauty of it. It can be found in so many forms, through so many beings. In my eyes, love is one of the most important things in the world because it provides a feeling a safety and helps to connect beings. I like the phrase, “love is a universal language,” because there is always a way to show care without necessarily having to say it out loud. Companionship, compassion, and care are all ways to show how a person values another. Love is beautiful and should be expressed to the comfort of each individual so it can be used to make the world a better place.
August 1, 2024 at 1:30 am
Love is a complex and multifaceted emotion, that has captivated humanity for centuries. It manifests in various forms, each uniquely profound. Whether it’s the passionate connection between romantic partners, the deep bond within families, or the strong connection among friends, love plays a pivotal role in shaping our lives and creating fulfilling relationships. Romantic love, in particular, is celebrated and renowned for its defining qualities such as deep affection, intense passion, and a profound emotional bond between two individuals. This type of love has the power to bring immense joy and fulfillment. However, sustaining it requires dedicated effort, open communication, and compromise. The beauty of romantic love lies in its ability to inspire and transform people, compelling them to strive for the best versions of themselves. Friends often serve as confidants and sources of joy, enriching our lives with laughter and shared experiences. The love shared within families, whether between parents and children, siblings, or extended relatives, forms the core of our support systems and provides a sense of belonging that is unparalleled. This type of love is characterized by unwavering loyalty, unconditional acceptance, and the nurturing of values that shape individuals into kind, compassionate, and empathetic human beings. The love and care within families lay the groundwork for a stable and nurturing environment where individuals can thrive and grow. It is within these familial bonds that we learn about trust, respect, and the importance of unconditional love. As we navigate our way through the intricate tapestry of life, the love and support of friends become invaluable. True friends become like family, offering unwavering support, understanding, and companionship through life’s ups and downs. The laughter shared, the adventures undertaken, and the heartfelt conversations that take place among friends create a rich tapestry of shared experiences that form the fabric of our lives. This type of love is characterized by its spontaneity, authenticity, and ability to evoke a profound sense of belonging and friendship.
August 2, 2024 at 5:30 pm
Jesliann R.
For a long time love was a word that I struggled to comprehend. As a young girl, I thought that love was only for the people that were married. Something that only happened in the romance novels I was obsessed with or the movies that I would watch. When I got older, I understood that love could be shown in many ways. It can be used when that one friend cancels all their plans to spend time with you. It could also be used when a parent yells “THAT’S MY BABY!” at the top of their lungs when you graduate. It can equally be used when a puppy waits for you at the door when you come back home from work. Honestly, I am still learning what love is. I am still learning how to express love to others and how to love myself too. It has been hard because love is not something that can be taught just by reading a book. It is shown by a person’s actions and attitude. Love for me has always been a strong word. I believe that love is how I feel about music. Love is how I feel about the boy that I am currently with. Love is how I feel about the job I have. Love is when you’re laughing so hard with your best friend that your stomach hurts. Love is taking time out of your day to sit and watch a movie with your family. This is how I understand what love is.
August 2, 2024 at 9:07 pm
An important belief I have is the significance of female friendship. As you grow up, you always have the constant and few females that you can count on. These girls can be relatives or even classmates from preschool or kindergarten. You will go through the many phases of life with them, and all your different eras. But, in that same breath once starting middle school many girls lose those female friendships. This loss of friendship can be caused by so many petty things; I mainly believe it is due to society’s influence on young girls. The friendship between girls is extremely unique and one of a kind. You have a built in emotional support system and someone you can have fun with all in one. Girls everywhere can benefit from healthy and supportive friends. Your girlfriends understand and validate your feelings. When I get together with my closest girlfriends we talk about our problems but at the same time laugh until we start crying. I always feel united and connected to my friends, and never in competition with them. Female friendships are like creating your own sisterhoods. In which, you are able to become the best versions of yourselves. That type of love which is fostered in female friendships is not located in anyone else due to the compassion and empathy we view each other with. These are safe spaces to where you can go where your voice is seen and heard. Female friendships are extremely important when it comes to your journey in life.
August 6, 2024 at 1:10 am
I agree with this. Female friendships are one of the greatest things in life. Everyone should experience at least one genuine friendship when they are young as it builds so much character and understanding.
August 5, 2024 at 7:58 pm
Emily M.
One belief I have about love is that we need to learn to love ourselves. Oftentimes, we as a society can be very critical of ourselves. Whether it be our bodies, our facial features, our assets, our financials, and so much more. We need to step up and recognize we are our own biggest critics. Everyone is so focused on providing love to everyone around them that they forget to take step back and learn to love themselves. I observed that the spike of social media usage during the COVID-19 pandemic caused a lot more people to compare themselves to online social media influencers and celebrities. I myself witnessed my close friends and colleagues diminish themselves because they felt they weren’t as good those portraying their live’s on social media. We were all sitting here with our hair in messy buns, in pajama pants, with no makeup on, while social media influencers cruised out to private islands and posted pictures of themselves laying in the sand of Caribbean beaches with bodies built of plastic and faces of professional makeup and then caption there photos, #socialdistancing. Many influencers would post pictures of themselves building unnatural physiques some can only dream of, and caption it #athomeworkout. It wasn’t the most confidence boosting thing to see while I sat there behind a computer screen on a zoom meeting trying to stay awake at 8am on a random day in the middle of March when the world shut down. All day long when class wasn’t in session I had nothing to do but scroll on my phone for hours, and so didn’t most teens across America. After hours of consuming the digital feeds of so many different platforms it would be so hard to sit there and have anyone attempt to love themselves when the rest of the world looks like they could wakeup and walk a runaway just after getting out of bed. Truth be told at one point or another everyone has had a moment where they struggle to love themselves whether they will admit to it or not. It’s hard to look in the mirror nowadays at a realistic body and appreciate it when we have a world full of botox and photoshop. I believe before we compare ourselves to the unrealistic looks and lives of others, we need to take a step back and look at ourselves and appreciate we are genuine real humans, who live normal lives, who have kind hearts and good intentions. There is always going to be someone out there who loves you, and I suggest we all take a moment to learn to love ourselves. I know it’s easier said than done, but it’s something that needs to be done. Not only for your well being but for those around you. One of the most common quotes you hear about self love is, “If you can’t love yourself how are you ever going to love somebody else”, and I agree with that quote fully. If we as people can’t appreciate ourselves, it would be incredibly difficult to allow someone else into our lives to love and appreciate them, the way we should be loving and appreciating ourselves. You are the most important person in your life, you control what happens, and you’re the one who decides how you perceive yourself. And that doesn’t have to be a negative thing. We all deserve to be loved, by ourselves and others. But it starts with you.
August 8, 2024 at 3:32 am
I truly agree with this! I really do like how you came in from the perspective on self love and the true importance of it. This is such an important topic and I feel like it doesn’t get talked a lot about, but you explained it really well and it was such a good read.
September 4, 2024 at 1:43 am
I agree, and I love how this was said! Self love is something so essential in life despite how some may feel about it. The way you spoke about love really made me think deeply about this topic.
August 5, 2024 at 9:35 pm
Oriana S.
I used to think that love was always black and white; you love something, or you’d don’t. This past year, I’ve found love is much more complicated than that. During high-school, I was in a romantic relationship that ended my Junior year. After the break up I wasn’t treated very nicely, not just by the person I dated but by some “friends” as well. It made me feel horrible and I felt anger towards them. I never wanted to speak to them again, but I still loved them. It was really hard for me to wrap my head around, because I always thought that you did love someone, or you don’t love someone. I did not think that I could love and hate someone at the same time. I have since become friends with a few friends since the break-up in junior year. There is one person however that I was friends with for eight years that I am no longer on speaking terms with. What confused me was that I still loved her, even though we ended the friendship on bad terms. It didnt make sense to me because I believed thag love was meant that someone was meant to be in my life forever, but it also made me ask questions. If someone was not good for me, how could I love them? Why does loving people hurt? This made me realize that love does not mean that someone is good for you, and that sometimes you can love people and not be a part of each other’s lives at the same time. Me realizing this made understanding my feeling easier, and I definitely be keeping this in mind as I meet new people in college.
August 6, 2024 at 1:05 am
Ava B
I think love comes in so many forms. There is friendship love, family love, self-love, and so many more. Love in general is one of the greatest wonders of life. We as humans waste so much of our time on things we do not genuinely have love for. For example, say a sport. We may grow up learning to “love” playing a sport but lose that passion for it as we grow older. Our parents wouldn’t let us quit so we had to keep playing just to please them. To keep on playing a sport you no longer have passion for just to satisfy your parents, is such a huge waste of time when you could be doing something that you find delight in. Imagine how much better you would feel looking forward to something you genuinely love doing everyday.
Another example of something we waste our love on is a spouse/ partner. He or she could be the best person ever in the beginning but show you their true colors later on. In relationships, it is hard to find out how your partner really is after adoring them so much at the start. People usually will not leave their partner when things start to get bad, because of “what could be.” You think that they will change or go back to how it was in the beginning of the relationship, but in reality, who they were at first was just a mask. In this generation, it is hard to find someone genuine, but it is harder to leave the person you thought you loved.
Friendship love on the other hand, is very different. Finding a friend, you can relate with and be similar to is so wonderful. It is very hard to find these days as girl friendships in particular, can be very toxic. Personally, from middle school all the way to my senior year I was friends with the same 4 girls. At the end of school, the friendship became very unhealthy, and I ultimately never talked to them again after we graduated. Looking back, I wish I would’ve created more friendships with other people as I would only really talk to them. Basically, I wasted away many years loving the same girls who just betrayed me in the end.
Overall, it is important to spend your time on people and things we love because at the end of the day we only have one life.
August 6, 2024 at 6:12 pm
Sydney P.
Growing up, I believed love was something you had to earn. It didn’t matter if people were “meant” to love you. You had to earn affection. To be the best person, and make very few errors, otherwise your love will be taken away. Perhaps my outlook on what love should be was influenced by my upbringing and the individuals I call my parents, but there was a strong prevailing attitude that I had to demonstrate my worth in order to get love. This belief occupied my mind until recently. I learned from being in a relationship, that love is not contingent upon earning or proving oneself. Love was a happening that transcended whatever mistakes committed, remaining steadfast and unaffected. Although love may be challenged at times, individuals should not feel compelled to demonstrate their worthiness to others in order to experience love. Learning this was challenging for me, as during my childhood, this idea held significant control over my mind. It was confusing to realize that love didn’t require any effort on my part, as simply being was enough to be loved. I am still hesitant about the concept of love, which significantly impacts certain areas of my life. Nevertheless, I am making an effort to comprehend that love isn’t something that must be earned. In certain situations, love must be fought for and is challenged, but it shouldn’t always feel that way. It is important to remember that love isn’t something that must be won. Personally, I find it difficult to accept love, but I am making an effort to be more receptive to the possibility that someone may genuinely love me without any ulterior motives or expectations. Love can be free.
August 7, 2024 at 8:34 pm
That’s a very beautiful way of explaining things. I really liked what you wrote and how you wrote it.
August 11, 2024 at 7:34 pm
I love the way you explained everything that helped you learn including speaking on challenges
August 15, 2024 at 12:36 am
I really love how everything was worded, all of these things are so true to me. Love is all about making an effort 100%.
August 7, 2024 at 3:54 pm
Teni O.
I remember my mom always telling me that she did not want me to date until I was older, now I understand why. Love can be so thrilling and consuming when it first happens, but it often shapes how you see yourself and the people you meet in the future. At the beginning of 2022, I started dating someone that I thought I would end up with for the rest of my life. I was ultimately blinded by love and I did not see the type of person he was. We would plan out our future and make different kinds of promises that would eventually get broken by him.
Falling in love with someone at such a young age altered my view on love. It led me to be a different version of myself that I knew wasn’t me. I started acting like someone I knew I wasn’t, which led me to start focusing on bettering myself.
Finding yourself after such a challenging relationship involves discovering your values and having self-love. I began to figure out that self-love is the best kind of love. Having self-love makes you more resilient and capable of receiving and giving genuine love. Self-love builds inner peace and confidence which can help navigate you in life.
I’ve learned that your self-value is not determined by the opinions of others. Discovering self-love helped me learn to value my qualities and helped me treat myself with the kindness and decency I knew I deserved.
August 7, 2024 at 8:04 pm
Connor I
When I was younger, I thought that loving someone was simple. I mean, how hard could it be to show affection to someone special?
Back in high school, I was madly in love with this one girl. She was cool, edgy, and uniquely different and I always loved talking to her. She was amazing. However, it was never a perfect friendship, far from it. There was one time (or many times) where I thought I was helping her but only for the subsequent conversation to end up in tension. But nothing was bad as the time when I decided to flirt with her after her first breakup (I will NEVER forgive myself for that. What was I thinking?!). However, our friendship only got worse from there. I remember that she would be brutal on discord, and it really hurt my feelings. She was vicious. It got so bad that soon the school got involved and my parents started worrying about me. Eventually I just stopped talking to her. Everybody I knew, my friends, my parents, my sister, my teachers, everyone told me that she was trouble and that I should stay away, which eventually, I did.
In the end, it looks like things have gotten better. She wrote some stuff on her Tik Tok the genuinely made me smile, so I hope to talk to her one last time and bury the hatchet with an expanded version of this blog post. Like, it has 700 words so I could not post it all here, but if you have any questions, I would be happy to answer them.
In the end, Love is like the Seirra Madre. Finding it, though, that’s not the hard part.
It’s letting go.
August 8, 2024 at 3:26 am
Alyssa V.
Plates smashed against the wall, forks and spoons hurled across the dining table—my home was a battlefield. A relationship so toxic that I often found myself hiding under the table, waiting for the storm to pass. Food, the very essence of nutrition and life, became a trigger for chaos. Perhaps this was why I hadn’t grown as much as my doctors predicted. “Nutrients make you grow big and strong,” they would say, but I never felt strong enough to catch the flying plates and utensils. In the midst of these never-ending fights, I found a glimmer of hope—a story of resilience I could someday share to inspire others. The turning point came with a simple phrase, uttered by someone who saw through the turmoil. A notification from my boyfriend, accompanied by the chirping of a little bird, would light up my room. Four simple words: “Did you eat today?” At first, I rolled my eyes and deflected the question with, “How was the gym?” or “How’d you sleep today?” But the persistence of that little birdie made it increasingly difficult to ignore the question. Day after day, the texts evolved into deep conversations and dinner dates. My stomach, once aching from the lack of nutrition and the knots formed by anxiety, now hurt from laughing too hard and feeling too full. Nowadays, tracing my steps back to that moment, I understand very well the power of those four words. Not only did they change my relationship with food; they changed life. What was a source of distress turned into a symbol of love and care. These lessons underscored the fact that no matter the depth of the dark, it is often a simple act of kindness that may be the needed change. Now, when I think about food, it is no longer dread that fills my mind but thankfulness, and perhaps even more important, hope for the future.
August 8, 2024 at 2:30 pm
Thank you for such a thoughtful post. For folks looking for nutritional resources on campus, note that Jeanne’s cupboard is available and will help provide you with food if needed. Here is a link with info: https://www.umassd.edu/jeannescupboard/
August 9, 2024 at 12:32 am
Gabriela G
I believe that love has great power in people’s lives. It can drive you to do things you never believed you could. Growing up, I observed different types of love and wondered how it feels to love someone. I wanted to experience it as many people around me did. Many of my friends would talk about it, and I would not understand. I only knew the type of love between friends and family. Sometimes, I thought I was not meant to be loved by someone because when I tried looking for love, it never ended well. I felt alone and unmotivated, but with God on my side, I was able to overcome these feelings. When I finally had the chance to learn how to love someone, everything changed. My life transformed completely when I met him—someone who taught me how to love and take risks. Love changes your mind entirely. When it was just me, I would only think of myself and my future goals. Now, I think about our entire future together, including our combined goals. I am grateful to God for bringing us together. Now I know what this type of love feels like. There are many types of love, such as those with friends, family, and God. This particular love changes you completely. Love is powerful, and I wish everyone could experience it without remorse. Overall, love the people close to you, your job, and yourself. Love is what makes life complete.
August 9, 2024 at 2:51 am
Ariela B.
Love is often seen as magical, effortless feeling, but in reality, it can be pretty complicated. whether it’s relationships, friendships, or family bonds, love involves more than just cheerful or warm feelings. It comes with it’s own set of challenges that make it far from simple. One big hurdle is communication. Talking openly and honestly with someone you care about can be tough. Misunderstandings and different viewpoints can lead to arguments and hurt feelings. It takes a lot of effort to learn how to communicate effectively and work through disagreements without letting them interfere. Another challenge is balancing out your needs with those that you love. Relationships often require compromise and adjustment, which can be tricky. You might need to shift your exceptions or change how you act to make things work. Find the balance between what you want and what’s best for the relationship involves a lot of give – or – take. Growing up I would say communication and balancing out your needs are the two that I struggled with most. My parents really never taught me how to communicate. All I ever knew how to do was keep all my feelings inside that bothered me the most. which then took a toll on my mental health. I always thought “the less I talk the better, no one gets hurt”. Even after thinking these words I was the one that got hurt and the other didn’t. I always thought it was better that way. During my relationship I found my way to communicate. Without communication its hard and nothing ever gets solved and I found that out the hard way. You either push your partner away or they push you away. This is also where balance comes in. Giving your partner what they need and also them giving you what you need. Being in love is being head over heels for someone, and your willing to do anything for them. Me being who I am, I found a way to balance and communicate but it is hard. No one every told me that “Love” was hard and I had to figure that out that hard way.
August 9, 2024 at 12:29 pm
Ying Jian
I will talk about love then. My mother and father, their state relationship was acceptable to each other, so they decided to marry for love. However, there is always a saying that people change after marriage. And this saying was confirmed by the marriage of my parents. My father changed, he became physically and mentally abusive towards me and my mother. He only knew to request but never knew to give. My mother also changed. She became tolerant, but also extremely unsatisfied with the pain, the pressure, and the disgusting phlegm my father spat on the wall. I used to observe them through my young eyes and wait for one of them to directly break the love between them and get away from the suffering. Finally, my mother made the move and left. I was sent to my grandmother’s.
While growing up with my grandmother, I first ever felt a sense of stability. I was no longer sent to one person’s home to raise for a year and then another’s home for three months. The stability of my grandparents made me feel love, and being loved. I looked at their marriage. They were married at 18 years old and were still together in their 60s. The tranquility and flow of tacit agreement between them were different than what my parents displayed in front of me. From there, I know you all can see. Love is all about stability and respect. It is about understanding and accepting someone, not tolerance, but acceptance. No one wants a partner who hits them every other day and does not work a bit to improve the life they choose to share. I just want you all to be cautious and understand that there should be respect in love and violence is not allowed. If you find the fit, go for it. As my mother liked to say, “I’m not living your life for you, so you choose” (Eye roll).
August 9, 2024 at 12:43 pm
Allyson Fatyol
Love is powerful force that can deeply impact someone’s drive and desire to live. It is a complex emotion that can be challenging to describe, For me, it was an unexpected and a unforeseen experience. When I switched from Electrical to Maufacuring Engineering Technology (M.E.T.) in high school, I had no idea I would end up dating one of my classmates.
From the first day I joined M.E.T. shop, my now-boyfriend (Lucas) developed a crush on me. As he got to know me better, those feelings only gre stronger. Yet, he still kept his affection to himself throughout our entire high school experience. It wasn’t until after our final day of classes that he finally confessed his feelings to me. At first, I was unsure how to respond, as I had always seen him as a brotherly figure, part of the tight-knit family we had formed in that shop over the four years of high school. After some reflection, I decided to take a chance and give the relationship a try. Lucas is one of the most sweetest guys I have ever dated and he will always make time. For instance every time I have a bad day hes always able to make time for me and cheer me up even when he had a even worse day than me. He has been the best decision i’ve ever made.
These past two months have been the happiest of my life, and I now I have a deeper understanding of the true power and significance of love. The connection I share with my boyfriend has profoundly impacted my life in ways I never could have imagined.
August 9, 2024 at 6:03 pm
Feggens M.
Love comes in many different shapes and sizes, expressed in a million different ways. It is a process of connecting our souls in desire, lust, or a need to protect. The relationship with your friends and family is similar, as they are your peace of mind. The person who lies beside you every morning is someone you’ve chosen to be with, for as long as that last.
If your heart has a significant void, don’t seek love for comfort; instead, find inner peace first. Don’t force love on someone, as that’s a selfish thing to do to both you and them. You cannot force someone to love you for what you provide materially or the feelings you think you provide.
It’s fascinating how love works. Many of us attempt to explain it, but I believe love isn’t meant to be explained. Love is like water, taking the shape of the vessel it occupies the human soul. Love is a universal truth that exists because it’s unconditional, a desire to protect. I believe loving is living in the moment which triggers strong feelings of affection, belonging, and protection.
Many of us deal with loneliness and chase love to distract ourselves from it. True love for others comes when we truly love ourselves first. To treat others with love is to treat yourself with love. It’s a process that takes time, effort, and careful consideration for both you and others. Do not try to fight the feeling because you might end up hurting someone along the way. When i truly experienced love, it was an amazing feeling that i thought i could never experience because i never loved myself enough to see how wrong i was. Love can be humbling because its often you convincing yourself that you love something which is not always the case. Love is a passion not a mindset.
August 11, 2024 at 7:35 pm
I love your intro
August 9, 2024 at 6:34 pm
Emily Glover.
I was young and naive to put it simply. I never understood the term “blinded by love” until I entered my first relationship at the end of my sophomore year in high school. Over a few months, the boy I met in my Spanish soon became my boyfriend, the person I should have trusted and cared for, but it quickly became overwhelming.
Instead of being his partner, I was forced to take a mother-like role. I quickly became stressed and anxious. It was not supposed to be my job to make sure I brought him to work, fed him, and made sure he went to sleep. I was surrounded by the mound of separation anxiety we both had created in him. I had to remind myself I shouldn’t have to be responsible for him, only myself. After all, we were only 15 and 16 at the time.
It was hard to let go, but independence was far more important. I wanted to share this experience because it changed my view on independence in a relationship. I now understand that a healthy relationship requires independence,
August 12, 2024 at 4:12 pm
I love this. I like how you opened up about this because it can be so vulnerable!
August 10, 2024 at 3:29 am
Camila D.
As my high school years ended, I came to the realization that some people use love and manipulation to get what they want and hurt others whether it’s in a friendship or relationship. I had a friend whom I had gotten very close to in a short time my senior year. We were always together, going out and spending time together until they started making me feel like I was in the wrong for any little thing. Time passed and I let it slide but things started getting worse. From getting treated as someone who they cared about to being treated as if I didn’t exist, wasn’t a good friend or like everything was my fault. I never really realized it then but some people tend to keep you in their life to use you or mistreat you. I’ve always been the person who cares about people deeply without even realizing they treat me badly or poorly. I believe that sometimes the love you have for someone blinds you from seeing how they truly treat you. Not everyone is meant to be in your life permanently and sometimes it’s hard to realize that. I also believe that it’s best to be careful about who you choose to be in your life and who you surround yourself with. I’ve learned to be around the people who truly care about me and who will be there no matter what the circumstances are. Long lasting friendships and relationships are hard to find but be true to yourself and do what is best for you. Never let anyone treat you as if you’re not good enough.
August 12, 2024 at 1:56 pm
Camila I am so sorry this happened to you as I can relate to this in a couple different ways and I agree with you that you should never let anyone treat you like you aren’t good enough and that sometimes the people in your life aren’t always going to be their forever sometimes when people need to leave you need to let them leave.
August 14, 2024 at 1:35 am
I am so sorry this happened to you! But I also experienced this in a different way. But I agree you should never allow someone to degrade you, however I also understand that when you really love someone and believe they love and care about you as well that you become blinded by what is truly happening and it is a terrible feeling but it will always make you stronger and a better version of yourself.
August 11, 2024 at 7:30 pm
Niema Y.
Thinking about this, my response to this prompt was interesting. To me I believe everyone deserves love from the moment they are brought into this world, no matter what. Whether the person is different from you or not, why not just love?. Right now in my life I see where the “Love” isn’t unconditional as everyone says, me being a young masculine black woman whose family is old school, I can see where all these sayings our parents said to us for us to grow up nice humans contradict with the real world, including our parents themselves. Depending on your background some people pick up beliefs from their parents that certain people don’t deserve to love and I did in fact have those parents. I’d grown up hearing LGBTQ people were sinners and what not, but also being in the closet I grew to believe no matter what you deserve nothing less than love especially from the people who raise you. After everything with my family being unaccepted and growing up in a day where TikTok exists, I’ve seen where people just want love because they don’t receive it here or there and turn into people who bring hatred or pain, whether it’s intentional or not. The world wonders why there’s war,why people have insecurities,what makes people tick and the truth is there just isn’t enough love going around.
Believing in love leads to being a better person, like i previously said people wonder why others act out or why their families have issues but there’s all this depression, abuse and manipulation. If everyone loved better, there’d be a world where there’s less school shootings, less violence, no racism or sexism, happy marriages regardless of sex. Loving is important for everyone, it’s probably the easiest way to boost your serotonin in my head. who wouldn’t want to wake up to see your family or friend and to be greeted with a huge smile and/or hug, maybe a compliment or a gesture which leads to an amazing start to your day that can be passed again and progress as it reaches others.
Obviously not everyone is going to abide by this happiness but a little goes a long way with understanding and passing along happy emotions. The only real way for us all to live on earth in peace is to make peace, respect others and spread the love.
August 12, 2024 at 1:53 pm
Onyx Brightman
I believe that love, while innately good and amazing, can lead to people making bad decisions to keep one type of love like a relationship while hurting others that they have a different type of love with whether it be familial or friendly. I know because of something I went through with my mother. My mothers then boyfriend at the time had been making comments to me about my body developing nicely for people my age and just making comments that made me uncomfortable but when I went to report it she ended up taking his side over mine because of her love for him. In the end the decision, while it allowed her to be able to keep her boyfriend and the romantic love they had at the time, slowly started to destroy and hurt the familial love that we had as I was struggling to get over the feeling of betrayal from her taking his side over mine. I feel like love has its great qualities but what isn’t talked about is how much it can also end up destroying people if the people you love take someone else’s side and ignore any concerns you have about that person. Love can also be good for giving second chances even though my mom did what she did I still gave her a second chance to work on our relationship and still while I will never trust her to the extent I used to trust her before my love for her allowed me to give her a second chance to work on bettering herself.
August 12, 2024 at 4:10 pm
My strong belief is that love has more power over our lives than we know or believe. I think love has changed outcomes of my life, paths I take, decisions I make and who I am. I believe love is such a strong emotion that it can alter every other emotion. I think that when being a little girl feeling loved by your parents made everything in the world brighter and happier, as I got older my love by friends broadened my world, my thoughts and who I wanted to be. Being loved romantically changes who you are, decisions you make and future plans. My experience with love from family has taught me that family is something that will always be there for you. Through highs and lows somehow no matter what they are always there offering their love. Sometimes love is hard to understand because love is shown in so many different ways even ways that we maybe don’t like or understand in the moment. Love from friends gets you through your hardest times and gives you your happiest times. It gives you stories to tell memories to make and comfort when you need it most. I believe that love lasts from the day someone is born to after death. I plan on taking all of the love that I have with me and finding more in college. I know that I have my loving family and friends support for this milestone of life and I know I will find love from more people in college that will last a lifetime and I can’t wait to find the love, adventure, life changes, and memories that awaits for me at college.
August 13, 2024 at 9:11 pm
Mohamed Ahmed,
I strongly agree with you that love has more power over us than we know or think . I think a lot of us underestimate what goes on inside our body’s and emotions and then suddenly it comes out and no one knows wherre it came from
August 12, 2024 at 10:21 pm
Evan W
When I was younger, I always had thought that the sign of a good relationship was time. Phrases like “living happily ever after” and “’til death do us part” had me convinced that time was what made a relationship stronger. I started dating a girl in middle school, someone I had been friends with for four years prior. We dated for a while and I thought everything was perfect. We’d had no fights and we were happy.
But as we neared three years, I was coming to realize I identified as male, which scared me. My girlfriend constantly talked about how she’d never date a man and how gross they were and how she was uncomfortable when our friends referred to me as one. So I squashed that part of me away, hoping that time would make the situation better. We made it to three years, two months, and twenty-three days before I broke it off. I thought our clash of identities was the biggest problem, but I discovered the true issue: our lack of communication from both sides.
It took months of teaching myself how to communicate before I felt comfortable in a relationship again. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year, and we aren’t perfect. But when we have issues, we sit down and talk with the other to find a better outcome. Our bond feels stronger because we are comfortable enough to bring up our feelings and concerns with the other.
August 12, 2024 at 11:21 pm
Mekkei B
It was sixth grade when I started to question who I was. I was never the most outgoing, but I had my group. At this time love was reserved only for my family. This is also the year that kids would laugh at me and call me gay. I never thought I could be until they decided it for me. The next year our teacher told us that it is ok and important to find love outside of your family and relationships. My friend took this to heart and told me that she loved me. I didn’t know if I loved her, and I would get uncomfortable the times she repeated it, paused, and said it back to not hurt her feelings. I think I learned to care about her over time. Then in the eighth grade I realized I was gay. I would look around at my classmates and see them hanging out outside of school, texting, and calling; this put a seed in my mind that I wasn’t good enough to do that. Then the quarantine happened, and I was left with my thoughts. With the time I spent in my head, I had learned to hate myself. Nothing about me was right. And when I entered high school, I got a fresh start, that’s where I met my best friend. His friendship gave me the ability to let people in, the ability to love. I started to accept and love myself. I have so many wonderful people in my life now because of what he did for me. My life became brighter since I learned to accept everyday as a good one. Now my life is full of love, for him, for myself, for my family, and for all my friends that continue to make me smile. I will always be grateful to him, thank you for everything.
September 3, 2024 at 10:47 pm
I definitely agree that finding your true self is important. Additionally, I agree that having someone around who you can be your authentic self with makes it so much easier to be able to grow and become who you are meant to be. I’m glad you had the opportunity to learn to love yourself and others around you.
August 13, 2024 at 3:35 pm
ZairahS
“If they wanted to, they would”
We live in a generation where the bare minimum is so normalized and “normal” stuff are seen as “weird” and “embarrassing”. Everyone is trying to live up to a standard that is broken and confusing, they live by stuff from one perspective and disregard that there are different views to stuff. A good example of that is the quote “If they wanted to, they would”, it is most commonly used when someone sees someone else receive something/ treatment they wished they got, typically from the person they are attracted to. I couldn’t count how many times I’ve been told that by the people around me and in the spur of the moment I usually agree to make myself feel better, until one day I looked at the situation in a different perspective. Imagine being the person referred to when that quote is mentioned, you could’ve been trying your hardest that day, or gave everything you had, but just because somebody else did something “bigger” or “better” for their significant other your actions are seen as less than. Teenagers in this generation expect things from other teenagers that come easy in your 30’s once you are financially stable with a good career and have something going for yourself. Yes some teenagers have something going for them now and can provide all the expensive stuff they want, the brand name and designer stuff, but we are still teenagers… we are still kids. Being treated like the outcast or lesser than because you don’t have something that a stranger on their for you page on TikTok has is what this generation has come down to. Never do they take a second to think about how many times they wanted to reach out, to say something, to do something, make the first move, reply to someone’s story, post that picture on their main story instead of their private one and so much more. They view life based on their perspective and the crazy standards society has put up around them, so my question to you is “How many times did you want to, but didn’t?”
August 14, 2024 at 1:25 am
I agree, the term “if he wanted to he would” is true, however it is too normalized because not only males but females keep a whole roster of who they just want to keep around to use and it is not fair because its just social media. If social media wasn’t so big there wouldn’t be as much hurt or heartbreak. Social media is good in some aspects but demoralizing when it comes to “norms”. All the “norms” make is scary to ever make a move or be honest with others and yourself, because there has been countless times I wanted to and regretted on missing out because I was worried about stuff being said about me because it is the “normal thing to do”
August 13, 2024 at 5:47 pm
Emma A
I used to believe in the true love that we would see in movies or read about in fictional stories. But this generation, gen Z that is has made me change my beliefs. We live in a toxic culture, where they are normalizing cheating, lying, and narcissism. My personal experience that made me change my beliefs in what love really was, the things that I have seen what my friends and family have gone through. Like manipulation, narcissism, and domestic relationships. Like for instance, my best friend who has been dating this one person on and off for three years and continues to go back to him fight after fight, putting herself back into a toxic environment because she believes she can change him for the better. Or manipulation for my other friend who has been talking to one person for a few months now, and because she will not do him a big favor, he is using it against her and will not allow her to contact or be around him. My previous personal situation acted in a narcissistic manner. He would constantly be around one female who was clearly in love with him but acted like she was not when she knew that he was talking to someone and would constantly try to flip the switch and saw the physical care in my but would always try to flip the switch and play the victim. After this all happened to me and everything that I have learned, lived through, and seen. It has all turned away the story definition of true love. So, with all that said, does true love still exist? Or is it gone in the toxicity of our generation.
August 13, 2024 at 6:23 pm
Olivia P.
Love is the most incredible emotion. It comes in all shapes and sizes. There is platonic love, familial love, romantic love, self-love and more. I think that self-love is the most important type of love because when you love yourself, love just exudes from you. Have you ever been around a confident happy person? They are the best type of people because as well as them knowing that they are amazing they see the amazing in everyone else. It is important to be around good people who make you want to be a better person. That is where familial and platonic love comes into play. I have always had amazing friends, but for a year in high school I had a toxic friend. Being a confident person looking back at the situation, it is obvious how having a toxic friend who is dismissive and rude can affect your confidence and how you love yourself. When I dropped that friend, I was incredibly confident and happy so that is why I believe that surrounding yourself with good people and having healthy relationships is important. I think that others should listen to my beliefs about love because it can be proven how important love is to have in your life. I have always believed that love is all around us, whether it be from your parents, your friends or your significant other. Love is an incredibly strong emotion that everyone deserves to feel in one way or another. What did you do to make someone feel loved today?
August 13, 2024 at 8:19 pm
When going through life it may seem as though there isn’t any love in your life, but that is quite the opposite of the truth. Love is everywhere, from the little interactions you have with strangers, the hobbies you enjoy, the fond memories you have, and the friends and family in your life.
I work at a grocery store, so I tend to see a lot of different moods in people. I love to interact with others, and I also love seeing people help each other in the smallest of ways. If someone drops something, someone will either point it out or will even pick it up for them. I’ve seen total strangers pay for other people’s groceries when they’re unable to. The pure emotions people have when something nice is done for them is something that warms my heart. Although this may not be the type of love you think about when the word “love” is brought up, it is a form of love that can really change someone’s day or even week. I don’t obviously see this all the time, but even to see it once a month shows how humans are meant to love and care for each other, even if it’s unconditional.
The next time you go out, I want you to look around and see how much love people have for each other, even if it doesn’t seem like it. Love is all around you in many different forms.
August 15, 2024 at 4:58 pm
I love your zoomed in perspective on somthing as seemingly average as the grocery store. I love finding the beauty in little moments such as the ones you shared, and I think stories like yours are what prove humanity’s instinct for kidnness. I loved your closing paragraph because I too believe if everyone lived their life looking for love and beauty rather than negativity our world would be a better place-and I know that’s cliche to say.
August 13, 2024 at 9:09 pm
Mohamed Ahmed,
Love is something that is different and unique to every person depending on who they are how they were raised and who they used the word with. The truth is anyone can love and anything can be loved as long as it has the will for it. I believe love is something you should experience with someone you truly feel something for which you’ve never felt before. Something indescribable and something never been felt before. For when you reach this is when you find out that you love. Love isn’t described by a definition. It’s a unique link for each person to another. It’s easy to be deceived and believe you are loved when you are not. It is easy to do the same back and believe you love when you do not! The most important thing is how you manage your feelings and handle it after making such a discovery. With that, love is something everyone deserves to experience. And everyone deserves to have love in them. No matter where they get it from. Without love you won’t have peace in your life. Find someone for you and Leave the rest.
August 13, 2024 at 9:45 pm
Vivian D.
Was this my first love?
He was once a popular boy who caught many girls’ attention but mine. To me he was just a player who had no good intentions. I disliked the idea of him. My focus at that time being was just my studies and achieving life. Little did I know he was going to end up right in my life. At this point I knew he was a big flirt but something seemed different about him or was I just being like these other girls. My friends still saw him as a big time player but of course I was one of those who believed they could change the player. Not too long with his and I’s interaction came along a red flag. He stated that he does not do relationships but of course the minute I started losing interest he wanted to give us a chance. For a week at least. This was like our trial but instead of it being a good week it was a rocky month. It was turning into a jealous relationship on both sides. Yet somehow all of this was my fault. Time would pass by and my self esteem would go down. I wasn’t loving myself but yet I believed I loved him. Of course we had our good times, at least for a short while. I helped him with his studies while he helped me to get out of my shell and be more social. Then it took a turn where we were back to where we first started.My self esteem chipping away along with my peace of mind. I would just tell myself this was my first true love and that this was normal for a relationship. When things got really toxic a break was needed. I took some time to reflect, realizing how much I lost myself that needed to be regained. In the beginning I believed he was my first love, the truth is I needed to be my first love.
The question is, what was he to me?
August 16, 2024 at 2:19 am
I feel like a lot of people will be able to relate to this in some way, I know I definitely could. I like the honesty in your post. A lot of people need to learn to love themselves first, or be their own first love like you said. I had a time where I lost myself because of the person I was with, so I honestly just related to this post a bunch. It’s hard when you go through something like that, especially not knowing if you should give someone the benefit of the doubt and stay, or if it’s too toxic and you need to leave.
August 29, 2024 at 2:58 pm
that is so true, when you lover yourself first than, you will be able to love others and recognized true love.
August 13, 2024 at 9:48 pm
JosephD.
The previous 12 years of school have been a significant time of reflection in my life. One of my most important realizations is my changed perspective on love. More specifically, my perspective on love from my parents.
Growing up I did not have the cool easygoing fun parents. They were very strict and held many standards and expectations. I often didn’t see the same amount of praise I saw from other kids and their parents. I would hear things like “My mom is my best friend.” from other kids while at home my mom would tell me “I’m your Mother not your friend .”. I took there discipline and high expectations and mistook it for a lack of affection. This made me feel like there was nothing I could do and that no matter what I did I wouldn’t be good enough. This misunderstanding would often cause problems between me and my parents, and I resented their tough love parenting .
But as I got older and learned more about myself and the world around me, my perspective on love and parenting started to change. I realized that they weren’t hard on me and strict because they didn’t love me, but because they loved me and wanted to see me succeed. They pushed me hard because they knew I could accomplish more and wanted me to succeed in the things that mattered to me . Even though my parents love was not expressed through a lot of praise or words, it was expressed through the effort they put into making sure I showed up to where I needed to be everyday put in the best effort that I could.
Now, that I am older and entering a new chapter in my life, I see their actions through a new perspective. Their love was always there, just in a way I didn’t recognize at the time. My parents sacrificed so much of their time and energy to make sure that I had the best opportunities. I carry with me the lessons they’ve taught me, grateful for their unconditional support and tough love.
August 13, 2024 at 11:29 pm
John G.
Love is a complicated thing. So complicated in fact that I believe that it is one of if not the most complicated things that almost everyone has or will experience in their life, and as I have grown older and matured I realize this to be more and more true.
When I was a young child I remember seeing in movies and cartoons that love is just this simple feeling where you see someone and then magically know that that person is “the one” and you should sacrifice whatever it takes to get with that person. As I’ve grown older I learned about different kinds of love, the love that you have for your parents, the love that you share with your friends, the love that you share with that special person, and many many more different kinds and ways to show it. All of these forms of love are equally as valid as each other, and I don’t think that you should sacrifice any of them for any other one, all of them share an equally important role in someone’s life so forgoing any of these for any other is not healthy.
Almost everyone has experienced love in some way, shape, or form, be it directed at them or them loving someone else. And that is because love Isn’t a simple thing, it’s very multifaceted and different people can feel it and show it in different ways.
August 15, 2024 at 12:34 am
This is great! You’re so right about love not being easy or simple. Love has up and down moments but you just have to push through if you believe your love is worth it. The way my parents showed love was very different from how I do.
August 14, 2024 at 1:15 am
Skyla D
Some people grow up not really knowing what love is, I was one of those people. Throughout High School I really tried to figure out what love is in all forms. I was fortunate enough to build amazing friendships, but I didn’t think just having friends was a form of love I mean I didn’t even know what It was. Junior year I had my license and started my first job where this guy walked in from school, we then became inseparable. We built an incredible bond not just at work and school but outside of both. I knew I felt something strong with him and he did too. I assumed it was love but I was so very wrong. I had my own bubbly personality which he appreciated but it just became complicated how polar opposites we were, but he couldn’t let me go so he kept me stringing along with him. I thought he did this because he loved me but he himself had his own personal issues. It got bad to the extent I was so beyond emotionally damaged by this that my friends got hurt and it started to tear apart those relationships. A lot happened that I wish did not but I did not realize until I finally let go forcing him to let go. We still stood friendly because of school and work but from a distance I never let him back into my world fully. I grew a lot as a person and the experience made me much more stronger and I learned that love doesn’t just have to be a relationship It is within friendships too. My friends never gave up on me even when I gave up on taking care of myself or abandoned them to be with him. This harsh experience didn’t teach me what love was it taught me what love wasn’t so I could then learn what love actually is. Me and him are better now, we are still friends and talk once in a while. Which is better because if you do love someone sometimes its better to be friends then have nothing at all it just takes time to learn from mistakes and how they allow you to grow into yourself. Ultimately this lead me to believe what is meant to be will be, due to the fact that at the end of the day things happen for a reason. Not only do things happen for a reason but to break us down to later teach us lessons are what makes us stronger. In the event the experience with him did not occur I would still look for love in people and not know what real love is or how to love myself first. After all of that I will still forever be grateful for him. Even though people hurt you sometimes it is a good thing to sit back and reflect then about it with them when the time is right because you will always feel better form closure even if it is not immediate.
August 15, 2024 at 4:30 pm
This is beautifully written Skyla. This experience seemed like it really changed you as a person. I’m happy you found peace and are grateful for this person, and I’m even happier you found love for yourself!
August 14, 2024 at 1:44 am
Michael L.
Describing love is a hassle and everyone knows it, everyone sees it differently. Before I delve deeper into my explanation I’d like to preface this by saying that for just over the last decade of my life I believe I’ve had a severe problem processing and correctly categorizing or identifying what feelings and emotions are what. Just as an example, for me it feels like I have to feign anger, I try to match other people’s energy from what I’ve seen in person and online. I’ve never been able to properly stay angry at someone even if they have given me a just reason to be mad at them. I can’t point out the exact root cause of these issues, but I believe a significant part of it was my father’s passing. It had a substantial but imperceptible effect on me. Regarding love, I thought it was something that I’ve felt before. Nothing as strong as described by some people. For me, it was more similar to a friend, just one who maybe does more important favors for you or ones you couldn’t do without them. Recently, I’ve toppled over that view and had a sort of epiphany. Now to me it is a rich, warm, and red feeling in your chest that provides you comfort and ease. There’s probably some chemical or signal responsible for that which I just don’t know of quite yet.
It’s a feeling of yearning to talk with them again, even just for a small fraction of time.
It’s that feeling of safety and security in knowing you could share the most horrible things that have happened in your life with them, and that they’d help or try to help in any way possible, all just to make you feel at ease.
It’s that understanding that you’d return each other’s favor no matter how big or small, or seemingly insignificant to you, if it’s important to them, you’d do anything.
I believe that proper communication between two people is key to an everlasting bond. Knowing that you can confide within someone properly and that they’d never turn their back on you leaves you with a virtually indestructible sense of self. I’ll throw this right back at you, what is and how important is love to you?
August 14, 2024 at 2:06 am
Isaiah R.
Everyone has different love for different things. At a young age, I was exposed to an extreme genre of music ranging from country, rock and roll to rap and R&B. At this time in my life, I had lots of hatred toward music. I vividly remember being in the car with my parents and my mom would play country music and I would always tell her to turn it off. I found music to be an irritating and loud part of my life that just seemed so unnecessary. I would prefer a quiet car ride to gather my own thoughts and enjoy silence. The loud thumps of the bass as the beat of the song played and the car vibrated was an invasion of my quiet and peaceful world. As I grew older, I was exposed to a different form of music, Rap/Hip Hop in the app, Musical.ly which is now known as TikTok, I found it interesting to see millions of other people lip syncing their favorite songs. Whenever I would hang out with my older sister, she would always play Rap or R&B and I became intrigued by the sounds of the music. I found myself hearing music the way she did and it was a form of expression and release. Her passion for listening to music is what sparked my love for the music I listen to today. As I sit with my AirPods in listening to music, focused on writing this. I now use music as a way to block out noise, calm me down when I experience various emotions, or even help me focus. Music has changed my life; I couldn’t even imagine life without the beautiful sounds of the music I enjoy. I discovered this amazing love over the course of ten years, what other hidden love is awaiting to be discovered?
August 14, 2024 at 6:33 pm
Kenzie S.
For as long as I can remember love has been a pivotal factor in my life. My parents have been happily married for over 25 years and set a picture perfect example for me from the beginning. I used to believe that love was easy because everyone around me seemed to be at ease with their love life, but as I’ve gotten older I realized love isn’t as easy as I originally thought.
In middle school all of my friends used to have “boyfriends.” I say it like that because are middle school relationships even real? I never had one. Sure I’d had crushes but it was just a crush, definitely not love. By the time I reached high school almost everyone I knew was in a relationship or had been in the past. This is the time where I really began thinking “why not me?” I had talked to guys but none seemed interested enough to date me. It seemed to me everyone had an easy time finding love except for me. I thought back to when I was younger believing love was easy and wanted to scream at her that she’d never been more wrong. Time passed and I met a guy where everything seemed super easy and I second guessed myself if love was actually as easy as I once thought and I just hadn’t been patient. I could not have been more wrong. Trying to form a relationship with him was actually one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. So no, love isn’t easy. It’s tiring, emotional, disappointing, and requires tons of patience. I still haven’t found love and honestly I’ve stopped looking. Love isn’t easy and it isn’t fair, but it’s also different for everyone. Your love might have appeared in front of your face one day so now you believe it’s like that for everyone but the next time you find yourself telling someone else “love is easy,” think again.
August 16, 2024 at 1:48 am
I definitely find myself relating to that. I often have watched so many people around me find the ones they love, with some of those relationships being only a matter of time, while some of my friends have relationships that are going to last until their last breath. Yet there’s always been me, watching from afar, alone. I’ve been upset, confused, and angry over it. Yet, I have to stop and question why. We both have had the mentality of “why can’t it ever be me?” I may not have an answer to why this is the case, but I have realized that perhaps that my mentality regarding others falling in love may be what is preventing me from finding my own. Perhaps, when I ascend beyond the feelings of envy, can I reach the happiness I seek.
August 14, 2024 at 6:34 pm
Jailyn C.
Since I was a kid I had never believed in the idea of “love at first sight”. To me it sounded comedic. How could you love someone by just looking at them? My mom and dad always told me stories about them falling in love the minute they saw each other. I never believed them because it didn’t make sense to me. I thought it was impossible to love someone the first time you saw them because true love means that you love everything about the person, flaws and all.
My sophomore year of high school I met this boy, we went to different schools and met at an ice skating rink. The minute we locked eyes I knew everything I thought about love at first sight in that moment was wrong. I’d never felt that way about a boy before and something was telling me to go talk to him, so I did and we clicked instantly. For two years I went on about my life still thinking about him. Never did I think locking eyes with someone would have such an impact on my life.
Two years later, I was now a senior and he was a junior and a boy had just recently broken up with me and I had no one to take with me to my senior prom. I then asked him to come with me, and ever since that day we have been talking non-stop and officially dating for 2 months now. If you would have asked me two years ago if i would be dating him right now i’d laugh at you and tell you that’s impossible. But my friends knew that we would eventually rekindle because they saw how happy he made me the day I met him. I believe that love at first sight is not something to be taken lightly, but it’s something that should be cherished forever.
August 26, 2024 at 7:39 pm
This really got me thinking if i should believe in love at first sight too. I don’t currently but your own personal story shows me that it really does happen.
August 14, 2024 at 9:56 pm
Kadence S.
When people say “opposites attract” what do you think of? Positive and negative, night and day, magnets, or even batteries? For my whole life it’s been something people would use to explain my taste in guys. Growing up as an identical twin, there’s always been a difference between her and I; our personalities. While she’s always been bright and bubbly, I’ve always been exactly the opposite. Not very friendly, protective and confrontational. A glass half empty opposed to a glass half full type of person. So when we started developing ‘tastes’ in guys, our different preferences were obvious. Her caring and loving personality has always attracted players and people with the wrong intentions. While I have always felt the need to protect the soft spoken and nice guys. When we would meet, her significant other and I would butt heads, just how she would say mine was too nice. It was only when people would point out the differences between my boyfriend and I, and my sister and her boyfriend that I realized opposites attract is really true. After that realization, I’ve seen it happen all around me. Before when I’d watch movies and the popular football player would pine over the quiet, smart girl, I thought it was unrealistic, but after turning over the phenomenon of ‘opposites attract’ in my mind, it was simple; opposites really do attract. Is it the questions and the thought of not knowing? Or the interest and mysteriousness of it all? Either way, differences keep things interesting and it’s important to have an open mind, because if two people are the same, chances are they’re personalities will clash.
August 14, 2024 at 10:06 pm
Evan L
I am a strong believer in the fact that love is the powerhouse of the strongest emotions of human beings. The first time lovers ever meet, the serotonin in one’s brain and the rush of that anxiety when their fingers first connect, when their hearts can interlink over simple words and touch, is love. A mother’s never-ending protection and unstoppable harmony of her child is love. A kid’s first time picking up a basketball or football and saying, “I want to be good at this one day,” is love. My personal experience of this is my love for the art of music. Take some time to think to yourself, people speak in notes, people talk in different pitches and different keys. Your husband or your wife talks in a different pitch than you, do you not see that as a harmony? It’s all love. When you’re at your school dance, dancing to your favorite song with your best friends, sweating bullets, not a worry in the world, Is love. Ever since I was a child, I fell in love with every song I felt, every note I heard, every beat I felt in my heart, but why? It’s so simple. It’s just music they said. Ever since I realized this as a teenager, music has become significantly more important to me in my everyday life. The love of music itself has controlled my emotions in actions in life more than anything else. Now think to yourself, did I underestimate love this whole time?
August 14, 2024 at 10:24 pm
Trinitee T.
Love is a hard concept to grasp. It isn’t something that can be passed down or even earned; first, it has to be taught. When I was younger, I wasn’t good at giving or receiving love. I never liked hugs, holding hands, or even saying those three simple words that are thrown around all the time. I wanted to give love but didn’t know how. Everything I did surrounding affection just never felt right. It was around the time that I entered middle school that I found a new friend group. It wasn’t big, nor was it small. Two boys, three girls, including myself. Two were a grade above me, and two were in my grade. One girl was a really big hugger; she’d always give hugs to everyone she knew, and I wanted to be like her, so I started giving her hugs too. One of the boys had really fun handshakes and taught us a few of them. The other boy was really smart, so he showed us many things and how they worked. The last girl was my sister; at the time, she was a little clingy and liked matching with her friends, so we all got bracelets. Soon, I found myself wanting to be like them. I began giving hugs, lending advice to those who needed it, and bringing gifts to my other friends; having signs that I was close to them.
These middle school friends changed the way I thought, acted, and expressed myself. They taught me how to properly give affection that isn’t just straightforward, through different gestures, actions, and plainly being there for someone. They showed me that love can be formed just through connections and understanding. It was through them that I realized the true complexity surrounding love and the different ways it could be expressed. I didn’t need to hold hands, always give hugs, or say those three words. It can easily be through how we make someone feel. Love is an unspoken language, and I think I can finally understand it. It makes me want to ask, how do you love?
August 14, 2024 at 11:11 pm
Love is an emotion that’s nearly impossible to explain. It’s overwhelming, gut wrenching, unpredictable, and unforgiving, but somehow is the most tender thing someone could ever possibly experience. I’ll be honest; I’ve never experienced romantic love. The whole butterflies in the stomach and mind clouded by rainbows have evaded me thus far, and hell may not even exist.
But…that doesn’t mean I can’t write about it.
For the past few years, I’ve dedicated myself to writing love stories between good people weighed down by the world. Love can’t heal, protect, or mend broken relationships, but it can support. Encourage. It can light up souls from within, and make you smile even when your world is falling apart. I write stories about people terrified of themselves. People who struggle to find even a little good in themself, but they have someone who sees the absolute world in them. Love isn’t the key to happiness, and it certainly isn’t perfect. But when you can sit with someone in silence, content with just a hand in yours and breeze through your hair, and truly smile from the inside out? Sure, a moment like that may be fleeting, but you collect hundreds, thousands, hell tens of thousands of moments like that, and put that in a little pocket in your heart. That’s what makes life so special.
August 15, 2024 at 12:30 am
Ayanalise G
Since the day I was old enough to watch fairy tale love movies, I always believed that you could only love one person in your lifetime and love is something you share with another human. I was surprised when I came to find that when me and my ex-boyfriend broke up that I in fact, could feel this for another person. Of course it wasn’t the same, but it was love. After that happened, I came to believe that love doesn’t just come once for everyone. There is still hope out there even when your world feels like it’s crashing. Shortly after me and my ex spouse broke up I soon became to realize that love comes in different aspects, shapes, and sizes. I fell in love with myself. I learned how to love myself and love my work and dance. I realized that my love for my passion dance it’s just as strong as loving another human being. The break up changed me and made me look at the world a little differently than I did before. When we broke up, I thought that was the end for me and the thought of loving someone else just made me sick. And I realized I had to keep going because the world was going to keep moving with or without me. I could’ve chose to sit in the dark and be hopeless but instead I healed and eventually got the love I deserved. This belief was so important to me because I thought love was only with one person and at the time wanted it to be him. I wanted that forever love story, but not every story is as perfect as you see in the movies. I believe others in my community and at UmassD should listen to my belief because maybe there’s hope for you as well. Maybe your first love wasn’t your last. And even if you don’t agree with my belief, everyone has their own journey that will lead them to their own beliefs. I only learned this from experience so sometimes you have to go to through it yourself to find your truth and most of the time it will be hard but just have hope. I believe that you can love more than once in your lifetime and it doesn’t always have to be for another human being.
August 15, 2024 at 1:01 am
Na’Shajia M
Growing up I defined love as the love I saw in movies, on Disney Channel. But, as I have grown, and faced many challenges where love was the center of it all, my brain has altered the definition of love. Love is sacrifice and love is pain. But that is the beauty of love. Love is not just something that you feel in your day to day life but it is what you do because of what you feel. Any time you commit to loving someone you make a sacrifice. That sacrifice is loving someone other than yourself.
Jesus made a sacrifice for us to put his life to rest for ours. He doesn’t tell us to do the same but when we love someone we make acts of sacrifice all along; taking our prime time to uplift, carry, and support others through times of trouble, having fears and concerns for them and gearing them towards the right decisions. Those are just some of the sacrifices we take for the ones we love, that is showing someone you love them.
Having so much love within my heart has caused me tons of pain that often felt unbearable. I spent a large portion of the life I have lived loving someone who didn’t love me the way I deserved to be loved. Loving someone so deeply that I received both mental and physical abuse was a testament of my heart and how strong it was. I stood not because I was weak but because the love overshadowed the pain I received. I continued to believe the person behind all of the pain, hoping to see again the person I fell in love with. Each day I woke up was a constant battle within myself, between the eagerness to escape and that my love can change the person to be better for me and heal the wounds inflicted upon my soul. In the end, receiving such abuse for love was one of the heaviest burdens for me, one that left both scars seen and unseen. It reminds me and taught me that even though love holds a strong amount of power, it should never become the cost of anyone’s well being. The adversity I have faced is a true reflection of the love I hold within and the love I give will never change because of it, though it is a reminder to myself to protect my heart and self from harm.
I will never stop loving because love is beautiful. Love in the form of purity guides us through our darkest times; it is the light that we need. I believe that love has the power to heal, to change, and bring loads of happiness. Every experience has shaped me into who I am today. Even with the hurt my heart holds it will always hope for a brighter tomorrow.
August 15, 2024 at 1:34 am
Kaiden Martin
Love can be described as the most intense emotion, shaping emotions into our lives, choices, and specifications in ways that can be overwhelming and indescribable. Growing up, I was always taught that love is derived from obsession and that the feeling of love for someone is cemented in our hearts forever. But growing up, I’ve learned that isn’t the case. My parents were together for ten years before they had me and my sister, and growing up was never easy. Not being able to sleep at night, hiding in my sister’s room, and having to take a step outside the house at times were all caused by the fighting my parents did. But I always thought it was a part of love, and I used to think I could not fall in love because of my hatred for arguing. As time passed, the bickering would only increase until it was absent. The week before Easter in 2020, my sister and I were told that my dad had been cheating on my mom and that he couldn’t argue anymore and left. My dad was the man, known all around my town for good things, and now known for destroying his family. Going through high school with no father figure at home, nobody to tie my tie for my first school dance, nobody to play catch in the backyard, and nobody to teach me how to play football made me question my belief in love, because if a marriage of 20 years can be torn apart by bickering, how would I last in a relationship?
True love is real, having that space of your heart devoted to someone even when they’re gone. Knowing deep down that if they came back that part of your heart would re-activate and give you that boost of dopamine, giving you a place where you feel the most secure, joy, and emotional reassurance.
August 15, 2024 at 2:06 am
Gustavo Brito
Growing up, I always had the belief that to deserve to be loved, you had first to prove to someone that you deserved it, so I would always do everything I could to try to make people happy, but never felt that I was appreciated for what I did, and that only caused me pain, leading to a feeling of having no place in a community or even a friends group.
After my first girlfriend entered my life, she showed me that loving and being loved is actually an experience with its ups and downs, and not every time things will go how we want it, making both of us unhappy even though we only wanted the best for each other, but despite that, we broke up and it was a devastating situation for both of us, which could not be fixed even after many attempts to get back together.
After some time reflecting on that, I decided that it would be better to take care of myself instead and dedicate myself to building a career, my health and friends’ relationships, all of which were very important to make what I am today.
The lesson that I take from this is to always dedicate time to make yourself better every day, be it small or big steps, even if you feel like no one else is by your side, you will notice that the most important thing is to always have self-love so you can have the strength to carry on and be the best version of yourself every day.
August 15, 2024 at 2:27 am
Jeremy G.
Throughout my whole life, I never really understood the concept of love. Listening to music is a big hobby of mine, and I notice that the number one thing that all artists make music about is love, no matter the genre. I understood the concept, but it feels even now kinda arbitrary, maybe because I’ve never felt loved, or felt comfortable to truly love someone. It’s not that I don’t have a family who loves me, but all the ups and downs just make it confusing for me. For one reason or another, I never felt that I could confide in any of them. And I’ve never really had a good friend either; the few that I are just busy or don’t seem to ever answer or text me or anything. My few experiences with loving someone other than a family or a friend have honestly just made me question myself even more in some aspects, although I’ve definitely learned a lot over the past few years. Through the friends that left me, and the relationships that didn’t work out, I kinda realized that the only one who’s gonna care about me is me. To me, that’s not a terrible thought, I don’t generally have a “woe is me” mindset, and I try to see the good in everyone. I care about the people in my life deeply, which can cause me to be critical of them, almost to a fault, but I’ve realized that’s for the better. The fact that no one in my life cares about me as much or more than I care about them except my own mother, and my family only makes me realize even more that I just need to learn to love myself. While it can be hard, especially after a breakup, I have too many goals to quit now. I really think that meaning of life is love, seeing as that you’re born by loving parents, and religion typically points to an all-loving being. I guess I’ll just have to see how everything works out,
August 15, 2024 at 3:11 am
Love is something we all crave from life in one form or another; whether it be platonic or romantic. True love is supposed to be reciprocated and honored. If you love someone, you would never do anything to hurt them. Sadly, that’s not always the case and the people who love the hardest get hurt the worst.
I myself struggled through the insanely complicated tango of an abusive relationship. I was deeply in love with a boy who would scream to the whole world how much he loved me, but never showed an ounce of love through his coldness and manipulative nature. It broke me, but broke me down so I could build myself up into an evolved, more knowledgeable version of myself.
Finding my self worth and learning to love after this experience very much reminded me of the beauty of kintsugi – the japanese art of embracing flaws and imperfections. One sided love can leave you broken; but when you finally realize your worth, it can leave mental cracks and flaws filled with beauty.
As hurt as I was from this experience, it left me grateful for knowing what love wasn’t. Now, in my current relationship, I’m able to know what reciprocated love is while also loving myself. I’m able to express love and have my values, boundaries, and wishes honored by my significant other. It’s helped me embrace my flaws and trauma because even though I was left damaged, I am still loved regardless.
August 15, 2024 at 3:42 am
Eliane Da Rosa Furtado
What is love? Having someone you love and trust by your side can bring light into people’s lives. Most people think love has to be someone you’re in a relationship with, but I believe love can be from your friends, family, and many others. There are times when people say they don’t need love from anyone to have good in life, I do believe that but having someone who encourages you every step of your life, is a different type of feeling.
I believe no one can live a long life without someone they love, or someone that loves them. Love is the most beautiful thing, your mood lights up when you know there are people out there that love and appreciate you. This generation believes that you don’t need love, which is true because most people can accomplish things in life without needing no one, but there is a point in life where everything you accomplish cannot compare to what love makes you feel. I believe no money, or material is better than feeling loved by someone. When you have someone by your side, who supports your goal will make everything easier. But everyone is different, some people grow up with no type of love so they believe that love does not matter to them, but what they don’t know is love is a beautiful thing everyone deserves.
For my life experience I grew up with loving people around me, but coming to America I felt lonely because this is not where I grew up, so it didn’t feel like home where I was loved. But I put myself first and I was able to make connections with so many other people who love me and help me every step of the way. One of the people who helped me a lot goes for my mom, she can help me every step of the way. I’m able to set up my goal high and make myself proud and my parents proud.
August 15, 2024 at 4:00 am
Carl T
Soulmates. Everyone has heard the term. Whether from movies, television, novels, or social media, the concept of soulmates is one which can be found throughout our society. The idea is that each person has a perfect match – one person who they were made for. It’s an attractive thought, that there is someone out there in the world who is meant for you. However, I reject this. I believe in soulmates, but I think they are sometimes far different.
I view the soul as the sum of an individual’s personality and experiences. Your soul is who you are. Therefore, the soul must be as fluid as the nature of people. It grows and changes in response to the events of your life. Thus, a soulmate cannot be some destined perfect, as people change. Instead, people become soulmates when their shared experiences cause them to grow close.
I learned this through my experiences dating my girlfriend. In our relationship, we have been able to largely avoid conflict, and when it does arise we have appropriately addressed and solved the issue. Is this because we are a perfect match? No. It’s because we were best friends for years before dating. Our friendship gave us a deep understanding of each other that has been the framework of our relationship. We each have grown and changed due to the presence of the other in our lives, and that gives us a shared bond. It is this kind of relationship that I recommend to everyone who reads this. Instead of spending time searching for your perfect match, use that time to grow alongside someone so that you can instead become each other’s perfect match.
September 4, 2024 at 12:56 am
I absolutely love the way you worded this, many people say soulmates are perfect in every way but it takes a long time to get even near perfect. This post kind of changed my view on soulmates because I never used to believe in them, but because they can take time then maybe there is a chance for everyone.
August 15, 2024 at 4:08 am
Leah T
Love means all types of things to all sorts of individuals. To me, love shows its value through loyalty. Loyalty is something I believe to be worth mentioning because it kindles relationships. When I say relationships, I dont just mean mother to son or boyfriend to girlfriend, but for me – myself to my pets. Many people have heard the phrase “loyal as a dog” and we have all seen the movies where the dedicated canine puts down his life for his companions. That is what I mean when I believe loyalty is a translation of love. Loyalty isn’t just taking sacrifices, but truly understanding someone or something no matter what they say when they’re mad or actions they perform by mistake. Everyone has gone through a time in their life when the loyalty in their relationship was completely shattered by it being overlooked, degraded, undervalued, or just blatantly ignored. Maybe reasons like this are why I sometimes value my connections to my pets more than people. My dog would never conspire to betray my trust – instead she just pees on my floor. Despite the hurdles my pet and I may go through such as patience and respect, we are still able to count on eachother in moments when we need comfort. It is a great feeling when your emotions or mental state is understood and acknowledged – and this is something that I am able to get from my supporting and loyal pet. To put things into some final words, the support that comes from a loyal relationship is what I believe to be the most powerful and constructive types of love out there.
August 15, 2024 at 2:15 pm
Laila A.
I never believed my mom when she said “If they wanted to, they would” in any form, within relationships or even friendships until I formed a stronger relationship with my close friend. Freshman year I had realized my close friend had been starting to feel like something stronger, sophomore had finally told my friend I had a HUGE crush on him, in a cooler way obviously. I would’ve never guessed the first boy I ever dated would’ve changed all of my beliefs so drastically. The first time I realized relationships of any kind are more than just one side was the day he told me he missed me more, I never thought a boy would think he had a competition with the strong feelings I already had for him with me. I went from having friendships and talking stages with people who made me believe it was okay for them to not care about me as much as I cared about them, to having someone show me I am worth putting effort into. This boy showed me not every conversation should be one-sided, you shouldn’t always be the first one to reach out for plans, or checking to make sure everyone around you is okay when they’ve never asked you the same question. He made me realize I shouldn’t try so hard for the people who wouldn’t do the same for me. He made me realize that it was more than just a statement “if they wanted to they would”, It’s about knowing your own worth and what you deserve, that there’s more than just a friendship, there is supposed to be a bond. He made me realize people did care. He made me see the people who really did put effort into our friendships, and helped me see who I should keep in my life and who I should still be friends with at a distance. This boy showed me He really does think I am fun to be around and that He always wants to talk to me. He showed me by showing up even when I was sick or sad, that I was worth Being loved. Today I know what my mom always meant, if they really wanted to care about you and have you around, they would put the effort in because they realized what you were worth. Now that I believe this statement, It changed all my views on love and relationships, and has even shown me more reasons to be confident in myself, as well as that I should really always listen to my moms advice. If they wanted to, they would.
August 15, 2024 at 2:25 pm
The idea that ‘love should complete you’ comes from the belief that being loved by another person can make you feel whole. They’ve shown this type of love in movies, TV shows, and books. The film where the person finds their soulmate and they’re now complete as a person is what most people want. This type of love is romanticized in many cases but I feel this can cause problems later in relationships.
A specific event in my life is me staying in exhausting relationships because of the fear of being alone. I began to dodge the red flags in the relationships because I believed they were the only person who could make me whole. I began to accept the love I thought I deserved. It led me to be in trapped relationships that were no longer healthy for me preventing me from working on my myself. I even began to change my interests to align with that person’s interests. I started to lose myself, I only wanted validation from my partner. All these were unhealthy patterns that didn’t help me at all.
Believing someone else can complete you leads you to depend on someone else and lose yourself. People begin to look for validation from their partners rather than doing things for the betterment of themselves. You can begin to neglect things you enjoyed or needed before the relationship. This doesn’t help with personal growth at all. After reflecting on my relationships in the past I realized our generation needs to show more healthy relationships on the internet where both partners support each other rather than showing the toxic ones online or in reality TV shows where people stay because they “ love each other so much.” Those are not real relationships.
My idea on this belief is important to my wider community and even people that agree with this because most people have gone through an emotional event in their lifetime where the love of something or someone caused them to lose themselves. Love shouldn’t complete you it should be an addition to your life. The best relationships are where you can disagree with each other, allow others to have their self-care, and allow each other to be themselves while still supporting each other. The belief that ‘love should complete you’ helped me understand that self-appreciation is the foundation of all relationships.
August 15, 2024 at 4:52 pm
Theresa B
I believe strongly in spreading kindness to everybody no matter what. We all carry an infinite capacity for love, why not use it? I do not say that without understanding how difficult consistent positivity can be. While acknowledging that my belief is not always achievable, I hold strongly in my mind the impact that something as simple as a compliment can have on an individual. As humans, our brains are built to respond one way or another to every situation we encounter. Kindness boosts the brain’s serotonin and dopamine, encouraging us to be happy. On the other hand, negativity boosts sadness, triggering a depressing cycle within the brain, making it much more difficult to escape the feeling of sorrow.
When I was a freshman in highschool I barely spoke, as I was bullied in middle school and spent much of my time during COVID-19 in my house with limited contact with my friends, as I was not prone to reach out. It was not until my now best friend began to consistently make an effort to include me in conversations and encourage me to participate that I grew into my own person. She always made me feel comfortable with who I was. Her compassion was refreshing and allowed me to see that it was possible for me to be loved and appreciated by others. I learned that you have nothing to lose by showing kindness to strangers and everything to lose offering fruitless cruelty. Be the one to break someone’s cycle the way she did mine.
August 15, 2024 at 5:03 pm
Arianna V
Since I was young I have always had a village. A village of people who have sustained, motivated, and cared for me. From a very young age I knew I had a village behind me. It didn’t matter that I didn’t have a conventional household that raised me because I believed you only needed the village of people who wanted to be there for you. A village of people are people who will be there for you no matter what, good or bad, sick or healthy, it simply doesn’t matter. Now you may be thinking this is just describing family but what makes it different is that a village can be made up of all different kinds of people some not blood related. My belief of this peaked when my father died the summer before my freshman year of high school. Nothing could’ve shocked me more deeply and even though this was such a rough and heartbreaking time for me I was able to get through it because I had my village. My village uplifted me and made sure I was never alone. Having people who care so deeply is one of the greatest blessings any person could ever have. My biggest belief so far is that I can do or be anything as long as I have my village. I encourage everyone to find the people who can build your village and hold onto them!
August 15, 2024 at 5:27 pm
Meghan H.
Love is a term that has confused me my whole life. I’ve found that as we grow older, the word becomes harder to say. As a kid you tell everyone and everything you love them. The bugs in the grass and the seagulls at the beach all feel the love of children. But as we age and mature the word becomes more sacred and has more weight to it. You might fall in love but wait to say the word until it “feels right” or you think you are in love but really it’s not love at all. Maybe you do feel love but you never show love out of fear. The word feels scarier than it did when I loved the bugs in my yard. However, as scary as love is, it’s the most exciting thing when it’s real. I love that I love myself. I love that I am able to love freely and that I am able to be scared of the love I feel. It’s exhilarating and terrifying when you realize that maybe it is love that you’re feeling. And despite everything, I do still love to find the bugs in my yard and the seagulls that steal my snacks by the water because I love all the things that prove to me that life is beautiful and real.
August 15, 2024 at 6:47 pm
Aliana R
Maturing is realizing that love is a contradiction– a dance between euphoria and tribulation, a mix of light and darkness.
In today’s world, love has become a concept we hear about constantly although it has become something that is now glazed over. This generation has taken love– something selfless and enduring–and replaced it with instant gratification and surface-level connections. The fundamentals of love that were once built on commitment, trust, and mutual growth, now too often crumbles under the weight of lust, convenience, and the pursuit of temporary pleasures. We’ve begun to measure relationships by how exciting they feel in the moment, rather than how meaningful they are over time. True love is built on respect, trust, and the willingness to weather life’s storms together. But in a culture that glorifies quick fixes, instant hookups, and superficial attraction, we’ve confused love with lust. I believe that it is the time to reclaim what love truly is. We need to stop letting social media, hookup culture, and the fear of commitment define our relationships because the truth is–we’re all just humans, navigating this life for the first time. We don’t have a manual, and we’re bound to make mistakes along the way. We hurt others, and we get hurt. But in those mistakes and misunderstandings we also learn that we are capable of allowing ourselves to heal and rebuild. Maturing is embracing the understanding that every experience–good or bad–has a purpose in our growth.The concept of love has been distorted. Real eyes realize that love isn’t about how good someone looks or how exciting they make us feel for a moment– it’s about how they make us better, how they stand by us, and how they help us grow.
August 16, 2024 at 12:53 am
I really agree with how you said how nowadays people confuse love with lust, as I see it happen all the time lately. It’s sad how love isn’t seen or understood for what it really is but instead confused with physical attraction and short term gratification. True love is so important to recognize and I wish more people understood it. I also liked how you said “Real eyes realize..” Lol.
August 15, 2024 at 9:02 pm
Sarah S
Love.
Love is so many things; love is my mom waking up early every weekend to make our favorite breakfast, love is my dad having a soft spot for his only daughter, love is my boyfriend helping me build my car. Love is so many things, it can be shown in so many ways, and it is everywhere.
Growing up, I wondered deeply what love was; what the single and definite definition of love was. As I’ve grown, I’ve also learned that love doesn’t have one grand definition. There are so many types of love, from familial love to romantic love, and so many ways to show it. There are people who show their love for others so easily, and others who have a hard time doing that. I’ve realized that I have a harder time showing things like love; I worry that it won’t be reciprocated, that the reaction I receive won’t be what I want it to be. As I think of all the times I’ve held myself back from doing something to show my love, I think of the advice I’d give to someone else. We shouldn’t be afraid to show how we love or care for someone, we should be happy that we’re even given the chance to experience something like love.
It’s hard to be our truest selves, especially in a generation that is so concerned about what other people are doing, or what other people think of them; a generation that revolves around social media. I think that one thing we can all agree on, disregarding any other beliefs we may hold, is the belief that love is powerful; love can be a beautiful thing, and we should try to share our love with the people around us. Everyone has their own way of showing love, so why worry about the ‘what if’s’, show love the way you want to, pour more love into the world.
August 15, 2024 at 9:41 pm
Ashlyn B.
A person’s quality of life and longevity are strongly tied to human connection. I believe that friendship is the most valuable form of a bond that one can create. Unlike familial connections, a friendship is not bound by blood relation or shared history. In addition to this, contrary to romantic relationships, friendship is not built upon the foundation of pursuing a partner. Rather, friendship is based around the personal connection felt between individuals and the desire to remain around them. In addition to this, it is scientifically proven that friendships benefit someone’s life overall, improving not only emotional well-being but also one’s physical health. One of the reasons I cherish my friendships so deeply is because through all of the highs and lows, I have remained with my friends based on the sole fact that we enjoy being around each other. I believe that someone choosing to be your best friend is the highest honor of love because they simply admire your personality and spending time with you. I love the saying “to be loved is to be known,” and I find it so special that humans are able to create bonds where we are able to share everything about ourselves with another person. I have many friendships that have carried on for years, and even the bonds that have ended I still carry with me. I truly believe that everyone is a montage of those that they have met and loved throughout their lives.
August 15, 2024 at 11:53 pm
Mark L
Election season is often a very divisive time in America. We are quick to take sides and judge others based on their opinions. People start to believe that anyone who thinks differently than they do is the enemy. However, hate is not the solution. We should solve our differences through consideration for each other. You can disagree with someone while respecting their beliefs.
Two people can look at the same problem, and come up with entirely different solutions that are both completely valid. As an engineering major, this bothers me, but it is something I had to come to terms with. Often, you won’t be able to convince someone to think the way that you do. And that’s okay.
I recently went on a road trip across the United States with my brother, and met people from every walk of life, some with stories, beliefs, and ideals I’ve never really considered before. I experienced many different cultures and saw how Americans lived throughout the country. I learned lots of things on this trip, but most importantly I realized just how similar we all are. We are stubborn, and fight for what we believe. And while our opinions and feelings and ideals can all differ, at the end of the day we breathe the same air, drink the same water, and wake up to the same sun. We all love and smile and cry the same. We are human.
August 16, 2024 at 12:21 am
Uchechukwu I
As I have grown as an individual over the past couple of years, I’ve realized just how important a role self-love and self-worth play not only in the perception of oneself but also in the perception and interaction with others. I remember a point in my life back in middle school and early high school when this mindset was one I struggled heavily with. I struggled with treating myself with kindness and taking the time to learn more about myself. This was evident in my relationships with others; I was so afraid that being myself would deter people from seeking friendship with me. It took me a long time to realize my lack of self-love was what was holding me back, but when I did, I started to take more time learning about who I was and what I wanted to achieve. I believe self-love is crucial because it allows you to put out the best version of yourself, allowing you to reflect that same grace and compassion onto others. Self-love inspires more meaningful and compassionate interactions, fostering understanding and respect. In addition, self-love provides a safe space to understand and accept criticism without taking it as a personal attack, while also providing a foundation on which you can fall back when establishing new relationships and setting up boundaries within them. I view self-love as a way of not only gaining respect for oneself and experiences but also accepting the flaws that come with being a human being.
August 16, 2024 at 12:37 am
Jaime L
Love is an emotion that all humans desire to feel. Not only do we want to love others, but we also want to feel loved by them in return. Every person is deserving of love, but over time I’ve realized that not everyone is ready to love. I believe that love begins with yourself, and you cannot truly recieve or accept love from others if you don’t learn to love yourself first. People are usually very aware and insecure of their own flaws and imperfections, and if you can learn to love and accept yourself despite these things, you will be better equipped to love and accept someone else’s flaws – and you will be better able to accept their love of your own imperfections. Self love is the first step to truly understanding what it means to love in fully capacity, and I believe it is essential to living happily and feeling content with yourself.
August 26, 2024 at 6:09 pm
I 100% agree with you. Loving one’s self will better equip them in loving and receiving love from others. This was beautifully written!
August 16, 2024 at 12:46 am
Sandy L,
Love. Everyone seems to know what the word means, but do they really know what love truly is? I don’t think the concept will ever fully be understood. Alain de Botton, a humanist philosopher, once said that love can be rational but also irrational at the same time. It’s a complicated feeling that comes in many different ways. Some types of love are romantic, platonic, or familial. When I was younger, there were moments where I did not believe I was loved or even knew what it was. I felt alone, but that’s when I realized that love is not only from other people. It’s from yourself too. There are so many moments in life where I felt love and just did not even know it. Love is when I am having a terrible day and I come home to see my mom is waiting for me after having cooked a delicious meal. Love is when I am with someone and all I feel is warmth and have no worries in the world. Love is when my cat, Crystal, comes into my room randomly and starts kneading my blanket and purring next to me. I’ve grown to realize that love is all around me, and I believe it is even within me, along with everyone else in the world. Everyone is capable of experiencing and giving love. The nature of love is filled with irrational and overwhelming aspects that make it difficult to understand, but that’s what makes it so significant in life.
August 16, 2024 at 1:42 am
Lunarose L
“The world is made of love and peace!”
This quote, one I find myself quoting often, is one that I hold true to my heart. Social media can often lead to people seeing the world as a negative place, more so than it truly is. Of course, there are definitely many things wrong with the world, people, and just about anything. However, if you choose to only look for the darkness, that is all you will ever find. If you choose to look for the light, often you will find it.
Before I acknowledged that I was transgender, I was not one to look for the positives. I was horribly depressed and truly had no hope or belief in others, especially for myself. I had no love for others, or for myself. I was hurting, and yet no one around me could see it? How could I love the people around me, if I didn’t love myself? How could I love myself, if I didn’t love myself?
To be honest, even now I don’t have the perfect answer. There’s no one method to just accepting and loving yourself for who you are. Hell, I struggle with it everyday. Despite the hardships, I fight. I had so many horribly negative and especially dysphoric thoughts, and as I realized I was transfemme, I strived to fight the horrible thoughts I had about myself by working on myself. I started dressing the way I wanted, I finally went through so much legal mumbo jumbo in order to start the medication that saves my life. It’s hard, transitioning is so hard, and even just being referred to as sir by random strangers can break my day. Yet, I continue forward in spite of it all, in spite of all the hate targeted my way, out of love. For the ones around me, but especially myself. I push forward everyday past the next difficulties in life, because I love myself. I love myself and I want to be the happiest girl I can be, and I’ll fight so damn hard to make sure the world knows that.
After all, the world is made of love and peace! If I love myself, then that is the only way I’ll finally be able to reach peace.
August 16, 2024 at 10:46 am
Thanks for sharing, Lunarose. UMassD’s Center for Women, Gender, and Sexuality maintains a list of resources to help support LGBTQIA+ students, which may be helpful for you. The list is available here: https://www.umassd.edu/cwgs/lgbtqia-resources/
August 16, 2024 at 1:44 am
Ava G
Love is a very broad topic. When you think about love it should come easy, you get a really great feeling about it. When I would think about love I thought that I wasn’t love properly or I was unloveable. Once I got older I believed that I needed to love myself a lot more than I actually did. Self love is the best find of love and makes you feel like others will love you too. Love could mean so many different things. It could be love for a person/people, a sport, or a place. Everyone wants to feel loved by the people around them.
August 31, 2024 at 2:45 pm
I was once like this, I believed myself that I was unlovable. Self-love is extremely important and it might take a while but, you just have to surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you and don’t bring you down for small things you enjoy or maybe even something they like as well. You are right and everyone deserves to be feel loved no matter what flaws they have.
August 16, 2024 at 2:12 am
Makayla M
I’ve always believed that unconditional love wasn’t a real thing. It wasn’t until my niece Paisley was born that I realized unconditional love was indeed real. She has changed my whole entire perspective on life. Before she was born, I was always the baby of the family so the transition to having a baby in my life was difficult. I was only 12 years old when she was born and I was extremely immature and self centered at the time. But as I grew up Paisley grew up alongside me. She helped me mature in all the ways that mattered. I went from being an annoyed pre teen that had no desire to deal with a baby to an adoring auntie that can’t wait for the next time I get to see her. It took a lot of time to get to that point, but now there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for that little girl.
She brings out the very best version of me in every single way possible. I work incredibly hard day in and day out to set a good example for her. As she gets older I want to be able to be a role model to her and also a shoulder to cry on when things get rough. Unknowingly, she has helped me through some of my own hard times and I’m beyond grateful to have her in my life. She’s my sunshine on a cloudy day, and she genuinely has become one of my favorite people on this planet.
August 21, 2024 at 12:58 am
Hello Makayla, I agree when you stated that “unconditional love is indeed real”. When you go into detail about your niece, I relate your story to my situation with my little brother because I was the youngest in my family before my little brother made his presence in 2013. I have realized ever since then that I am no longer the baby in the family and need to be the role model for him because our generation is always changing. (It is always important to be that protecting person). I also find it inspiring that she is the “sunshine on your cloudy day” because when our days are tough it is always comforting to know that we have someone to go who can listen and share a laugh with!
August 16, 2024 at 3:25 am
I kept asking myself, what do I write for a blog. I already wrote an essay to get accepted. As many would agree, why do we have to do this again. “Just get it over with” I tell myself. As I sit on my friends patio an hour before it’s due. I’ve always loved writing. I grew out of it because I started to hate expressing myself. Like my world became busy with others emotions and problems that I put mine to the side for a time that meant dealing with it. I guess the one category that spoke to me was love. Sounds corny when I say it to myself. But all I’ve known my whole life is love. Love is negative, it hurts, it’s damaging. But at times, it’s full and refreshing and flattering to say the least. it’s spiraling in my life. It drains me and it’s a mess. I think we can all agree this generation is sickening. I look at my best friend who’s been hurt and I once again ask why is this clement we tear apart every second so damaging. It’s been there since the beginning, the love and nurture of you’re mother holding you at birth. The family showering you with toys as you grow up. The first kid you kissed in kindergarten at recess. All the relationships that made you wonder, am I worthy to be loved at all? Or the one boy that broke you and made you question what was the point after all. And I’ll never know. I’ll never understand how such a thing can as important to one being. I come to college in search of love within new friends and relationships, within my career and future. And in the end, I will always have love for you. Whoever is reading this.
August 16, 2024 at 3:30 am
Amari G
Experiencing love can change a person’s perspective on relationships and reshape their understanding of connection, commitment, and emotional fulfillment. Love comes in many different forms; whether it be romantic or platonic. When a person loves or is loved, they often experience a sense of belonging and acceptance. I experienced true love my senior year of high school. I met a boy from another school who I saw a future with and truly wanted to be with for the rest of my life. Although I am young and have a full life ahead of myself, I saw a future with him that I couldn’t wait to see be played out. Unfortunately we broke up this summer but I realized being loved by him and loving him was something I wouldn’t trade for anything. Experiencing true love first hand made me realize that it is a beautiful feeling and that it can not be replicated. Knowing that there is someone who not only you can confide in, but also explore life with, opens your eyes to a lot of new possibilities. Not only did I have a partner, but I also had a best friend. He showed me that love isn’t just about 5 star restaurants or impressing one another, but it’s about quality time and getting to know one another past physical attributes. Learning to love someone for not just their looks, but their personality makes your relationship stronger and allows you to truly understand what the concept of love is.
August 25, 2024 at 6:00 pm
I agree, loving someone for the person they truly are is an incredible experience. When you know and love someone at such a genuine level, you gain a kind of closeness and intimacy between each other that allows for them to be an amazing friend alongside being your partner. I’ve felt that with my girlfriend, and I’m so grateful to be able to experience this kind of love.
August 16, 2024 at 3:41 am
Is tough love really love? I believe that depending on the person, tough love is truly love. Tough love is a way of pushing a person to be their best by being firm so that the person can grow and take responsibility while also supporting them through hardships. I’ve experienced tough love primarily through my relationship with my mom. I grew to realize that my mom’s tough love is actually love but when I was younger, I didn’t really think that at times. I used to misunderstand my mom’s tough love by thinking she was just being unfair, mean, and harsh. I would feel like she was always out to get me. My mom would expect a lot from me. She has always believed in me, what I could be, and how far I can go. Pushing me to meet my full potential was her way of showing her love. A specific event that led me to change my understanding of tough love was in my junior year of high school. I was very overwhelmed by school, work, and my responsibilities at home. I was so overwhelmed that I just broke down under the pressure so much that my grades began to go down. Instead of my mom just letting me quit and give up, she told me that being resilient and having balance is very important. She would not let me go out until I had completed what I needed to bring up my grades. At that time, I thought she was being so unfair but because she pushed me and had that tough love, I passed all my classes with honors. I had grown to understand that with tough love you take accountability and push yourself to reach your potential. This belief is crucial for a wider community because people can go through a lot of pressure to succeed but understanding the value of tough love can help us support each other.
August 26, 2024 at 6:06 pm
I agree with this. I also believe tough love is just another form of love. I grew up with a mom that sounds a lot like yours. My mom also has encouraged me on multiple occasions to keep going and to not give up on things.
August 26, 2024 at 7:21 pm
Great essay, I totally agree with it. Tough love really is important because although it seems unfair at the time, looking back on it you realize that whoever was pushing you was just helping you grow and become a stronger more independent person.
August 16, 2024 at 3:50 am
Cassidy Whitley
To love someone is a difficult thing to describe. Many languages have varying words for different types of love, familial love to casual love, yet the English language lumps all types of love into one phrase. Tone is the largest indicator of what degree of love you’re expressing, a quick “love you” to your parents as you leave the house does not meet the flamboyance of a rainy romcom scene “I love you.” I find it fascinating how one phrase can vary to such levels, but I believe it shows an utmost understanding that we have with each other as humans. From body language to tone, an “I love you” could mean a million things, and we always understand the degree of love we receive.
Although this language has limited us to this one passing term, we altered it to express so much more than just one meaning. I wish we had more words to describe our levels of love, but I find something so beautiful about the evolution of this one phrase. Three simple words that bring people together and that ruin people, a delicate phrase and a lingering phrase. “I love you” is a set of unchanging words with a meaning that is constantly changing, and as I grow older I find more ways to express my love for the people and world around me.
As I leave home and explore a new part of my life, I hope to find more meanings to this phrase. I want to find love in the work I create and the people I meet, finding new ways to express these three little words I’ve held onto so dearly.
August 17, 2024 at 12:18 pm
Maya Costa
I believe that everyone should make an effort in their lives to be kind to others. I find that so much of our modern lives are absorbed within ourselves that it can be easy to let kindness fall to the wayside. Being kind can appear in different ways. Many acts of kindness are distinct actions. Holding the door for a stranger, doing favors, or helping someone in need. But I believe that kindness should be intertwined into everything you do. Living your life as a kind person not only gives people who know you a safe space, but it brightens the world all around you. I believe that kindness is the simplest expression of love. Being kind doesn’t have to be a chore or a big show. Kindness can be as easy as picking up a piece of trash you stepped on outside. Freeing that bug instead of squishing it. Letting your sister borrow your favorite shirt. Once you start making an effort to be kind in your life, it will reflect on you as well. You will begin to have a more positive outlook. Regularly being kind to others makes it that much easier to be kind to yourself. This belief is very dear to me because I know how it feels to be treated unkindly. Unkind actions create unkind people, which creates a hostile world environment. The intention you choose to exude sets the tone for not only your life, but the world around you. So choose love. Choose kindness.
August 19, 2024 at 8:22 am
Infidelity is undeniably one of the toughest challenges I’ve ever faced. It forces me to delve deeply into the factors that shape someone’s behavior, such as their insecurities, past experiences, and emotional struggles. Love, in this context, drives me to examine these underlying influences more deeply and understand how they impact relationships.
Through this experience, I’ve realized that love alone isn’t enough to keep a relationship strong and enduring. The reality of infidelity has highlighted that love must be supported by other elements like trust, honesty, respect, and commitment. Without these foundational aspects, love by itself is insufficient to maintain a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
The process of forgiving is incredibly emotionally draining. Initially, it may seem like an impossible or unfair task. However, I’ve come to a understanding that forgiveness is less about condoning or excusing the betrayal and more about releasing my own pain and finding a way to heal. This shift in perspective is essential for genuine healing, whether it involves working to rebuild trust or choosing to move on and seek peace.
It has also prompted me to reassess what I truly want and need in a partner. It has become clear that qualities such as honesty, loyalty, and emotional maturity are crucial. This helps me establish clearer standards for future relationships, ensuring that I seek partners who align with my values and contribute positively to a relationship.
Lastly, I’ve observed that the phrase “I love you” is often used casually or without real commitment. This realization makes me question, how can I truly know if my feelings or someone else’s are genuine? Is “I love you” merely a phrase associated with being in a relationship, or is it something more profound that needs to be earned, deeply understood?
August 20, 2024 at 10:17 am
Ally C.
After reading “the mastery of love” , I came to believe that our generation needs to know that love is not about possession or control , but rather about freedom, respect, and understanding one another no matter who you are. To have self-love itself is love , love is powerful enough to heal , transform , and bring happiness into our lives. “ Happiness can only come from inside of you and is the result of your love. When you are aware that no one else can make you happy , and that happiness is the result of your love , this becomes the greatest mastery of Toltec: The mastery of love”. In the book, Don Miguel basically tells us the importance of self-love as the foundation for healthy relationships meaning when we love ourselves unconditionally, we are better to love others in the same ways. This reminded me about a person who I thought I was in love with used to mistreat me and didn’t care for me at all. Made me think negative about everything I do or say after a certain point of us being together where he started making me feel not enough. I learned that if really we value and respect ourselves , we wouldn’t tolerate mistreatment or disrespect from our partners. By embracing self-love, practicing unconditional love where you don’t seek to change or control others but embraces them for who they are , and respecting the freedom of others, we can create deep and meaningful connections with those around us. I believe love is an ongoing journey of growth, compassion, and gratitude. Love can mean anything to anyone because love is in every forms.
August 23, 2024 at 10:43 pm
Dennys M.
I believe that love is the great gift given to us by God, the unexplained feeling that we’re all too familiar with. We use the word love to show our affection or feeling to the important things in our lives. We use the word love on our family members, friends, pets, and possessions. Love is something that can’t be measured, for example you can’t take an X-Ray of a heart and find love. Love is not a chemical reaction, its much deeper than that. One of the reasons why I’m devoted to my faith and God is because of my experience of love, a feeling so intense and wonderful. I am a strong believer in the idea that all the conflicts and tensions around the world would be solved if everyone loved their neighbor as themselves.
One of the things that I love is music, and in music there are millions of songs about love. I think the reason for this is because love is relevant to everyone and everyone can relate to a love song. This also bring up another point that there is a different between loving a person and being in love with a person. While both feeling are different, they are the same in the way of wanting the best for that person.
People show love in different ways. Some people show love in very subtle ways while other show it in a more open ways.
Everyone is deserving of love which means that everyone should spread love as well.
August 26, 2024 at 7:46 pm
Jordan R.
I believe love is an emotion that people express when they feel they have a connection. It is a unique feeling of deep affection and care, that allows people together in loving and meaningful ways. Love allows people to connect to each other in compassion, empathy, and passion ways. Love has the power to heal pain, bring joy, and create purposes in life. Love allows people to feel a sense of closeness and commitment you don’t feel from other relationships. Love can include emotional, physical, and spiritual connections that create a deep bond between people. Love can inspire personal growth, change perspective, and motivate people to become better version of themselves. Love can be different in each relationship which makes each relationship special in their own way. Love is not just a feeling but is also an experience people need to have in their life. Love is that apart from giving you unconditional love to your partner, love also teaches you a lot of other significant lessons in life. Love can motivate each other to become better people, supporting each other through tough times and helping people get where they want to in life.